As I sat at the Thanksgiving table this year listening to the blessing, I found myself saying a silent prayer for my children.
I didn’t dwell on the fact that my children’s minds were taken from me by a mother that knows no boundaries. I didn’t find myself dwelling on everything that I lost. I didn’t find myself thinking of how unfair life is. Instead I found myself giving thanks to God for everything that I have.
Many of us are fighting to change the family court system and are trying to make things fairer so that both parents can have equal parenting time. The unfortunate thing is that this may take many years. Many of our children may no longer be children when this happens. We will have missed out on the Thanksgivings and Christmases of their youth.
We all need to learn to deal with the tragedy of what we have lost so that we can stabilize what we have and work towards growing stronger and being better persons. We owe this to our children.
The first step for me healing and being a better person was learning to forgive. I have forgiven my ex-wife for what she has done me and to our children. In the end we will all die and meet our maker and have to answer to him. It’s really not my job to judge her.
As I continued to sit at the Thanksgiving table I found myself silently giving additional thanks for the wonderful years I had with my children before my ex-wife poisoned their minds and turned them against me. I found myself thinking of the wonderful things I did with my children in the past when they were proud to call me dad.
For my oldest son I have one of the fondest memories of climbing Cathedral Ledge in North Conway , NH
For my youngest son, one of the fondest memories is when I use to call him “George the Monkey” from the Curios George books I would read to him and he would hold onto my hands, climb up me and tip himself upside down and just hang there like a monkey.
Some other fond memories were of my two sons sitting on the top of Cathedral Ledge both of them together. I have several pictures of them in the same place a few years in a row. To this day my computer desktop still bears one of those pictures.
I truly am a lucky man. I have memories of my children that no person can take from me. My ex-wife can destroy the present and the future but my wonderful past memories of our children is one thing she can’t destroy or take away from me.
Some fathers don’t get to have the experiences I have had with my two sons. Some fathers have lost their children prematurely to death at an early age and that is a true tragedy. My children however stressed things are between us are still alive and healthy. I give thanks for this.
I truly feel that God has a bigger goal in life for me. I don’t believe God is punishing me but helping me to be a better and stronger person. In the past few years, there have been several parents that I have helped that have had their children alienated from them. Maybe God intended this to happen to me so I would be compassionate to these people and I would learn to be helpful and patient. Maybe it is something that I had to go through to be able to help others. The truth is, no one but God really knows.
This holiday season join me in healing and give thanks to God for what you have. Don’t dwell on what you have lost. We owe it to our children to forgive and be strong. Let your children know that your home and heart is always open to them.
I can't imagine being Luke - having been ripped away, stolen away, and alienated from his father, and now trapped by the Stockholm syndrome - having to adapt to his "captor" in order to survive.
ReplyDeleteI can only imagine how trapped my son Luke must feel - knowing he loves me, knowing that this whole thing feels wrong - knowing deep down inside that something really messed up is going on, but not being able to speak about it or even bring it up at all. Having to keep your feelings quiet or even lie to everyone around you just to keep your alienator mother happy. That must feel so disheartening as a child - must be a very unhappy and sad little life.
I didn't do it to you Luke, your mother needs serious help.
This is a public denouncement of Bethany's destruction of my son Luke's little mind, and havoc-wreaking upon an otherwise normal little child's life.
Things will invariably get worse for him at her hands, before they get better, but when he finally realizes that his mother has been lying to him all of these years, he will detest her for stealing his childhood from him.
Signed,
Josh Youssef
Laconia, NH
NH committs Probate fraud in four jurisdictions involving Penn officials. Lenora Boehm assisted kidnapping child trafficking ring. NH is committing genocide against Fairbanks scandal victims. https://youtu.be/o7BN3wdvVqA
DeleteLove you, Josh
ReplyDeleteNY
I appreciate the above posting and have turned to the agape love of Jesus Christ. I have been persistant about learning to forgive and try every day to apply it in my life. It comes and goes as i struggle with the rediculas court system. My soon to be ex has a drug problem and was raised in an abusive home while being molested by her brother. She then was placed in a group home thru her teen years. I truely feel for her and understand she is a product of her environment. i understand she needd to lie cheat,fight, and steal as a survival skill and unfortunately became a lifestyle . i pray for her to become transformed and have a renewing of her mind and stuck by her thru adulterous affairs and drug addiction. after 3 reconciliations, i relized i could no longer be an enabler any longer and had to consider the damage taking place to my children. I asked her to leave . She has come to me in the past and trembled in my arms apologizing. I cant do this again. She filed for divorce in january and moved in with the drug dealer. She is not even trying to hide it anymore as the court system has taken my child from my care and now ordering support. My business was cleaned out, my belongings destroyed, and even as a first step i relized these were material things, Now my children are gone , with her, and in danger . I have no say in anything as the court has considered me emotionally abusive. the only thing keeping me from my child is a GAL claiming i disparage my ex in front of my child. Funny thing is.. i have constantly told my little girl a story about a princess and prince who had a baby.. she fills in the details as mommy ,daddy and ME ! she was taughht by me that she was created out of love .. the end . I am very active in my church helping many widows and orphans. Elderly and chaporone the youth group on events. I am looking at eternity in a comfortable way . I do so badly want to be a part of my childrens life . The system is pushing me into a cardboard box with no chance of that happening for many years . I will pray for her .. it all comes back to who started this process. for now i am forced to contribute to the drug abuse and paying for the boyfreinds drugs as well. My poor children have to be tramatized thru this and the court appears to show no signs of changing their tactics to complete and total family detruction
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