tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-43406355900804624352024-02-18T21:42:12.553-05:00NH Attorney Jaye Rancourt an Unethical AttorneyTHE BLOG ABOUT EXPOSING UNETHICAL ATTORNEYS, GUARDIAN AD LITEMS, JUDGES, MARITAL MASTERS OR ANYONE IN THE STATE OF NEW HAMPSHIRE THAT PARTICIPATES IN JUDICIAL CHILD ABUSE.Fighting Backhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10680648824756930269noreply@blogger.comBlogger146125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4340635590080462435.post-39530459346259566212012-05-26T10:27:00.001-04:002012-05-26T10:27:52.736-04:00What Happened To The Courthouse Forum?<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
One of our readers pointed out that the site Courthouse Forum has disappeared. Does anyone know what happened to the site? </div>
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Here is a description of the missing website site from <a href="http://societism.org/research/action-items/ratings/rate-judges-and-courts"><span style="color: purple;">http://societism.org/research/action-items/ratings/rate-judges-and-courts</span></a>. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></div>
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<span style="font-size: 12pt; line-height: 120%;"><span style="color: #0077b4;">Courthouse Forum </span></span></h5>
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<span style="color: #333333;">Courthouse Forum provides a unique and comprehensive platform for the open and candid evaluation and discussion of cases, courts, the judiciary, and legal issues. You can also participate by completing a judicial survey and providing your comments and opinions. Participation in the forums and surveys is FREE, and no log in or registration is required. Participation may be anonymous.</span></div>
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<span style="color: #333333;"><a href="http://www.courthouseforum.com/forums/judicialaccount.php" target="_blank"><span style="color: #cc0000;">Courthouse Forum</span></a> has a judge directory and court directory for each state and federal judiciary, discussion forums for courts and judges, judicial performance evaluation surveys to rate judges, worst judge voting, forums for legal questions, law and legal resources, legal news, judicial misconduct and judicial complaint information, court maps, and more.</span></div>
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<span style="color: #333333;">Visitors can vote for the judges they consider to be the worst judges, by going to the Judge Directories or the judge's page in the forum. Voting will continue throughout the year. Visitors are allowed one vote per session.</span></div>Fighting Backhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10680648824756930269noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4340635590080462435.post-23780714486596220242012-03-22T13:24:00.003-04:002012-03-22T13:47:45.520-04:00State Rep. George Lambert Authorizes four Subpoenas of N.H. Judges Who may Be Involved in Conspiracy<h2 class="date-header"><span style="color: #222222;">Sunday, March 4, 2012</span></h2><div class="date-posts"><div class="post-outer"><div class="post hentry"><a href="http://www.blogger.com/" name="8384968183348587610"></a><br />
<h3 class="post-title entry-title">State Rep. George Lambert Authorizes <b><i>four</i></b> Subpoenas of N.H. Judges Who <i>may</i> Be Involved in Conspiracy </h3><div class="post-header"><div class="post-header-line-1"></div></div><div class="post-body entry-content" id="post-body-8384968183348587610"><br />
N.H. State Rep. George Lambert, Brad Jardis, and Jason Talley are defenders of freedom, advocates of liberty, and strict constructionists of the Constitution. <br />
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Please watch this very important video wherein Jardis and Lambert breathe life into the subpoenas of 4 N.H. Judges who may be complicit in fraud and conspiracy to deprive a citizen of his liberty. <br />
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There may be serious implications under Title 42 of the U.S. Code, especially if it is determined that the Judge that ordered the arrest did so while he was *not* acting in the capacity of "judge." <br />
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We ask the question: If a judge orders the arrest of a citizen based on a false accusation, while he is not working as "judge," then has he violated the U.S. Code? <br />
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Followup question: Is a judge who is *not* acting in capacity of "judge" protected by "absolute judicial immunity?" Can he be sued under Title 42? </div></div></div></div>Fighting Backhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10680648824756930269noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4340635590080462435.post-9483203292604695542012-03-22T13:21:00.001-04:002012-03-22T13:45:05.492-04:00Joshua Youssef Takes on Tracy Bernson, Nancy Geiger, and the N.H. Family Court<h2 class="date-header"><span style="color: #222222;">Wednesday, March 7, 2012</span></h2><div class="date-posts"><div class="post-outer"><div class="post hentry"><a href="http://www.blogger.com/" name="2085719847765596182"></a><br />
<h3 class="post-title entry-title">Pt.2 - Joshua Youssef Takes on Tracy Bernson, Nancy Geiger, and the N.H. Family Court </h3><div class="post-header"><div class="post-header-line-1"></div></div><div class="post-body entry-content" id="post-body-2085719847765596182"><iframe allowfullscreen="" frameborder="0" height="360" src="http://www.youtube.com/embed/vA2ig3frQnc" style="height: 258px; width: 471px;" width="640"></iframe><br />
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As many of you recall, On Feb. 2, 2012, Joshua Youssef testified before the Redress of Grievance Committee at the N.H. House of Representatives regarding the destruction that was leveled upon his family when the N.H. Family Court ripped his son from him 13 months prior - with no findings of abuse or neglect!<br />
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In this second hearing installment, Mr. Youssef takes on several more tough legal and procedural issues that cut right to the heart of the corruption in the N.H. Family Court and N.H. Judiciary in General - specifically:<br />
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1) how former guardian ad litem Tracy Bernson filed a false police report, and through her attorney has attempted to improperly influence 2 judges that have been involved in the Youssef matter - a Class-B felony under N.H. RSA :3<br />
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2) How N.H. Circuit Court Administrative Judge Edwin Kelly contradicted himself by saying he cannot adjudicate Youssef's grievances and that "appeal" is the only procedural remedy - but then he signed 2 orders granting recusal of the incompetent, corrupt, feminist Marital Master Nancy J. Geiger and changing the case venue<br />
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3) How Youssef's May 20th, 2011 parenting plan was not ordered in accordance with N.H. RSA 490-D:9, and thus, should not be enforceable; and how the court "apologized" to Mr. Youssef basically asking Youssef to "cut them some slack." (quotations added)<br />
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4) How Pt.2, Article 73-a of the N.H. Constitution has created a self-regulating judiciary that is not subject to government of, by, and for the people, and thus is a hotbed of corruption, as is evidenced by N.H. Family Court Rule 1.2, N.H. Supreme Court Rule 3(9), et. al.<br />
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5) How N.H. House of Representatives Lawyer Edward C. Mosca's utilized his position as house counsel to "bully" Mr. Youssef from appearing at the Legislature, and how there is a very serious conflict of interest by allowing House Counsel to conduct a private law practice.<br />
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You will note that Youssef uses copious documentation to support his claims. Every single one of the questions asked of Mr. Youssef were addressed with law and fact and Youssef has indicated that he is available for comment.<br />
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It is amazing the lengths that public officials will go to in order to cover up their corruption! </div></div></div></div>Fighting Backhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10680648824756930269noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4340635590080462435.post-75235290213715736952012-03-22T13:17:00.000-04:002012-03-22T13:17:56.790-04:00The Boston Globe called on the legislature and the Governor to convene a Shared Parenting Task Force (From the website of Fathers and Families)<strong><span style="color: #600000; font-size: large;">Write <em>The Boston Globe</em></span></strong><span style="font-size: 12pt;">In an editorial this week, <em>The Boston Globe</em> called on the legislature and the Governor to convene a Shared Parenting Task Force. This could prove to be a <em>breakthrough</em> on shared parenting in Massachusetts, and then, like marriage equality, in the rest of the country. It is the first time <em>The Boston Globe</em> has taken a stand on a Task Force for shared parenting. <a href="http://click.icptrack.com/icp/relay.php?r=44750143&msgid=258612&act=X9Y2&c=1012846&destination=http://articles.boston.com/2012-03-%0d%0a%0d%0a19/editorials/31205651_1_joint-custody-task-force-custody-laws" style="color: #600000;" target="_blank"><em>The Boston Globe</em> said</a> there is “a genuine need to examine the workings of family courts,” Also, “It’s time to break the contentious impasse [on this issue].”</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 12pt;">This editorial will increase the pressure that Fathers and Families has been bringing behind the scenes for the Legislature to act. The <em>Globe’s</em> editorial is a direct result of YOUR past activism and support, as well as the activism of some who are outside of Fathers and Families</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 12pt;">It is time to keep up the pressure! We want you to do two things:</span> <br />
<ol><li><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 12pt;"><strong>For everyone:</strong> Show the <em>Globe</em> that a lot of people care deeply about this issue. <a href="mailto:letter@globe.com&bcc=fathersandfamilies@fathersandfamilies.org" style="color: #600000;">Write a letter to the editor</a> of <em>The Boston Globe</em> agreeing with their call for a Shared Parenting Task Force. Keep your letter to 200 to 250 words. Tell <em>The Boston Globe</em> how important shared parenting is for children and the need for genuine reform in our family courts. Women in particular should take this action. Now is the time to push this issue to the front burner. <br />
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Keep your comments positive. Do not criticize the <em>Globe</em> for not writing the perfect editorial. Write from the heart, and tell them BRIEFLY what your experience has been. Some additional themes are suggested below. Do not get off track with other subjects, such as child support or feminism, etc. </span><br />
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<li><strong>For Massachusetts residents only:</strong> Here is the second thing you need to do. Contact your Representative and Senator on Beacon Hill (not Washington, DC) and tell them you agree with <em>The Boston Globe’s</em> call for a Shared Parenting Task Force. Ask your Senator and Representative to encourage the Judiciary Committee’s Chairs, Senator Cynthia Stone Creem and Representative Eugene L. O’Flaherty, to appoint a Shared Parenting Task Force. The voters of Massachusetts are looking to them for their leadership.<br />
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Again, keep it brief, positive, upbeat, and free of sarcasm, bitterness or anger. Speak from the heart, and tell them your experience. You will probably be connected to a Legislative Aide rather than the elected official. That is standard practice, not a brushoff, so do talk to the Aide. <a href="mailto:fathersandfamilies@fathersandfamilies.org" style="color: #600000;">Email us</a> and let us know what they said.<br />
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<a href="http://click.icptrack.com/icp/relay.php?r=44750143&msgid=258612&act=X9Y2&c=1012846&destination=http://www.malegislature.gov/People/FindMyLegislator" style="color: #600000;" target="_blank">Find your senator's and representative's telephone number and email address.</a> </li>
</ol><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 12pt;">When you write the <em>Globe</em> and contact your legislator, here are points you can choose from to make. Remember to include information about your children.</span><br />
<ul><li><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 12pt;">Fathers and Families agrees with <em>The Boston Globe</em> editorial seeking a task force to review custody laws. </span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 12pt;">This is an ideal opportunity for Massachusetts to lead in developing true, working, shared parenting legislation. </span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 12pt;">It would also be a major breakthrough for gender equality in the family courts in America.</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 12pt;">Through a 2004 ballot initiative, over 86% of Massachusetts voters have already stated they want shared parenting. </span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 12pt;">Anything less than shared parenting penalizes innocent children and separates children from loving fathers, grandparents, and other relatives. </span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 12pt;">Your name and your town, so they know where you vote. </span></li>
</ul><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 12pt;"><strong>Our children need us to act NOW.</strong></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 12pt;">Ned Holstein, MD, MS <br />
Founder and Chair of the Board </span>Fighting Backhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10680648824756930269noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4340635590080462435.post-74916690058351241612012-03-22T12:50:00.000-04:002012-03-22T12:50:28.972-04:00Nicholas Haas-Redress of Grievance Hearing TOMORROW!!!<div class="journal-entry-text"><h2 class="title"><a class="journal-entry-navigation-current" href="http://www.nhinsider.com/letters-to-the-editor/2012/3/21/nicholas-haas-redress-of-grievance-hearing-tomorrow.html">Nicholas Haas-Redress of Grievance Hearing TOMORROW!!!</a> </h2><div class="journal-entry-tag journal-entry-tag-post-title"><span class="posted-on"><img alt="Date" class="inline-icon date-icon" rel="smalllight" src="http://www.nhinsider.com/universal/images/transparent.png" title="Date" />Wednesday, March 21, 2012 at 12:54PM</span></div><div class="journal-entry-tag journal-entry-tag-post-title"><span class="posted-on"></span> </div><div class="body">Public Hearing to be held tomorrow morning, March 22nd 2012 at 10am in the Legislative Office Building. Room 303. The building is located right behind the New Hampshire State House in Concord.<br />
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This Grievance is in regards to perjury, bias, parental alienation, GAL bias and collusion, judicial abuse and false imprisonment.<br />
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Children do best with both parents equally as the LAW STATES in RSA 461.<br />
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My husband, Nicholas, has not been allowed contact with his two daughters since September 26th 2009. A mistake on an order made by a court, unwilling to fix their mistakes, caused my husband to be falsely incarcerated and has caused severe emotional and financial distress on our family.<br />
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We have made our case public. We have reached out to the community and to those with power to help us (ex: Administrative Court Judge Edwin Kelly) and no one has fixed the mistakes made by the court causing the pain and suffering our family has endured.<br />
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With so much evidence and no where else to turn, we are going forward with our Redress Petition Hearing tomorrow morning.<br />
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Maybe the Legislative Branch will have something to say about innocent families being abused for WANTING TO SEE THEIR CHILDREN!!!!!<br />
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Please feel free to attend our Redress Hearing.<br />
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Blessings,<br />
Samantha Haas<br />
Hooksett NH</div></div>Fighting Backhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10680648824756930269noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4340635590080462435.post-75259853896762774582012-02-23T10:00:00.001-05:002012-02-23T10:00:47.012-05:00NH Attorney Lenora Boehm Receives Six Month Suspension - From The Professional Conduct Committee After Kimberly Frederickson Files Complaint - From The Website Of The NH Bar Association<strong><em>Bar News - March 19, 2010 <a href="http://www.nhbar.org/publications/display-news-issue.asp?id=5479" target="_blank">(Click Here To Go To NH Bar Website And View Original Article)</a></em></strong><span class="ArticleTitle">NH Supreme Court Professional Conduct Committee</span><br />
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<div align="center"><span style="font-family: arial; font-size: small;"><strong><em>Boehm, Lenora E. advs. Kimberly Frederickson # 08-055</em><br />
<span style="font-size: x-small;">Summary of Six Month Suspension<br />
With Three Months Stayed with Conditions For Two Years<br />
(effective April 1, 2010) </span></strong></span></div><br />
On January 19, 2010, the Professional Conduct Committee deliberated this complaint against Lenora F. Boehm, Esquire, and issued a six month suspension with three months stayed for two years, with the stayed three months not to be imposed if the Respondent meets certain conditions during that two year period. The parties stipulated to the facts, and rule violations of Rule 8.1(b): Failure to Cooperate, and 8.4(a): Misconduct. The parties also stipulated that Ms. Boehm would pay all costs of the investigation and prosecution of this matter.<br />
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Kimberly Frederickson filed a complaint with the Attorney Discipline Office (ADO) against Ms. Boehm, alleging misconduct stemming from Ms. Boehm’s representation of her ex-husband. The matter was docketed and Ms. Boehm was asked to respond to a letter dated December 11, 2008, from the ADO, to which Ms. Boehm did not respond. The ADO sent a second letter on January 13, 2009, and the Complaint Screening Committee sent a third letter on February 13, 2009, informing her that the complaint was being referred to Disciplinary Counsel for further action on both the failure to respond to a disciplinary authority and on the merits of the complaint. Ms. Boehm took no action until she filed her answer on July 13, 2009.<br />
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Ms. Boehm’s failure to respond to the ADO’s correspondence represents a knowing failure to respond to a lawful demand for information from a disciplinary authority, a violation of N.H. Supreme Court Rule 37A(II)(a)(5)(C). In view of the seriousness of Ms. Boehm’s misconduct and her prior recent and lengthy disciplinary record, it is the Committee’s view that the public can be protected, public confidence in the Bar can be maintained, and the integrity of the legal profession can be preserved only through Ms. Boehm’s suspension with conditions.<br />
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This matter is of public record, and available for inspection at the New Hampshire Supreme Court Attorney Discipline Office, 4 Chenell Drive, Suite 102, Concord, New Hampshire 03301.Fighting Backhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10680648824756930269noreply@blogger.com16tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4340635590080462435.post-84488162253589165102012-02-23T10:00:00.000-05:002012-02-23T10:00:12.728-05:00NH Professional Conduct Committee Finds Attorney Lenora E. Boehm Violated Her Obligations To Communicate Properly With Her Client – From The Website Of The NH Bar<strong><em>Bar News - September 5, 2008 <a href="http://www.nhbar.org/publications/display-news-issue.asp?id=4745" target="_blank">(Click Here To Go To NH Bar Post)</a></em></strong><span class="ArticleTitle">NH Supreme Court Professional Conduct Committee</span><br />
<i><span style="font-size: x-small;"></span><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: x-small;"></span><b><span style="font-size: x-small;"></span><span style="font-size: x-small;"><div align="justify"><span style="font-family: Arial;"></span></div><div align="justify"><span style="font-family: Arial;">The New Hampshire Supreme Court Professional Conduct Committee deliberated the matter of </span></div><div align="justify"><span style="font-size: x-small;"><span style="font-family: Arial;"></span></span><span style="font-size: x-small;"><span style="font-family: Arial;"></span></span> </div><div align="justify"><span style="font-size: x-small;"></span> </div><div align="justify"><span style="font-size: x-small;"> </span><span style="font-size: x-small;"><span style="font-family: Arial;">Ms. Boehm negligently violated her obligations to communicate properly with her client.</span></span><span style="font-size: x-small;"></span><span style="font-size: x-small;"><span style="font-family: Arial;">Ms. Boehm’s negligence caused her client to suffer needless anxiety.</span></span></div><div align="justify"></div><div align="justify"><br />
</div><div align="justify"><span style="font-family: Arial;"></span></div><div align="justify"></div><div align="justify"></div><div align="justify"></div><div align="justify"><span style="font-family: Arial;"></span></div><div align="justify"><span style="font-family: Arial;">Ms. Boehm was retained by Robin Marble on or about August 22, 2006, to represent her in a divorce. Ms. Marble paid Ms. Boehm a $3,000 retainer on or about August 22, 2006. Ms. Boehm filed an appearance on or about September 7, 2006. Ms. Marble met with Ms. Boehm on October 23, 2006. Following that meeting, Ms. Marble made numerous phone calls to Ms. Boehm. Ms. Boehm did not return any of Ms. Marble’s telephone calls, or otherwise communicate directly with Ms. Marble. Ms. Boehm did not respond to Ms. Marble’s emails in January, 2007 through April, 2007. Ms. Boehm did not respond to Ms. Marble’s request for a full refund of her retainer, to her request for a refund of the balance of funds, or to a request for an itemized bill for legal services. On or about March 14, 2007, Ms. Marble retained subsequent counsel. Subsequent counsel filed an appearance on March 26, 2007. Ms. Boehm filed her withdrawal on or about the same time.</span></div><div align="justify"><br />
</div><div align="justify"><span style="font-family: Arial;">The Committee determined that the following findings are supported by clear and convincing evidence in the record, and accepts the Stipulation as to the facts that:</span></div><div align="justify"><span style="font-family: Arial;"></span></div><dir></dir><div align="justify"><span style="font-family: Arial;">The Committee found that there was clear and convincing evidence, and accepts the Stipulation as to the Rule violations that Lenora E. Boehm violated the following Rules of Professional Conduct: 1.4; 8.1(b), and 8.4(a). </span></div><div align="justify"><span style="font-family: Arial;"></span></div><div align="justify"><span style="font-family: Arial;">Ms. Boehm was issued a Public Censure with Mandatory Diversion, and assessed all costs associated with the investigation and prosecution of this matter. The mandatory diversion component of the sanction requires Ms. Boehm to undergo an office management audit and comply with all recommendations of the auditor.</span></div><div align="justify"><br />
</div><div align="justify"><span style="font-family: Arial;"></span></div><div align="justify"><span style="font-family: Arial;">This matter is public record, and available for inspection at the New Hampshire Supreme Court Attorney Discipline Office, 4 Chenell Drive, Suite 102, Concord, New Hampshire 03301.</span></div><div align="justify"><span style="font-family: Arial;"></span></div><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial;">August 25, 2008</span></span><i><span style="font-size: x-small;"><span style="font-family: Arial;">Boehm, Lenora E. advs. Robin Marble #07-018</span></span><span style="font-size: x-small;"><span style="font-family: Arial;">, and issued a Public Censure with Mandatory Diversion on July 21, 2008.</span></span></i></b></i> <br />
<div align="center"><br />
</div><div align="center"><span style="font-family: Arial;">Boehm, Lenora E. advs. <br />
Robin Marble #07-018</span></div><br />
<div align="justify"></div><br />
<div align="center"><br />
</div><div align="center"><span style="font-family: Arial;">PUBLIC CENSURE WITH MANDATORY DIVERSION SUMMARY</span></div><div align="center"><br />
</div>Fighting Backhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10680648824756930269noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4340635590080462435.post-3511939631995836162012-02-23T09:37:00.000-05:002012-02-23T09:37:04.128-05:00NH Guardian Ad Litem Board Finds That Attorney And GAL Lenora Bohem Violated GAL Rules – Six Month Suspension Issued<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt; mso-layout-grid-align: none;">Our blog received an email that NH Attorney and Guardian Ad Litem Lenora Bohem was suspended by the GAL Board for misconduct.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>In looking into the matter we found the following which is an excerpt from the GAL report.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The whole report can be viewed by clicking on <a href="http://www.scribd.com/doc/73531101/Boehm-Lenora-sept2010"><span style="color: purple;">Boehm-Lenora-sept2010</span></a>.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt; mso-layout-grid-align: none;"><br />
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</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt; mso-layout-grid-align: none;"><b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-size: 10pt;">The Board has found that Ms. Boehm has violated Gal 503.16 (a) by failing to disclose disciplinary actions imposed by the NH Supreme Court’s Professional Conduct Committee in her application and supporting affidavit.</span></i></b><br />
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</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt; mso-layout-grid-align: none;"><b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-size: 10pt;">Gal 503.01(e) provides “The board shall find that extenuating circumstances exist if it determines that:</span></i></b></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt; mso-layout-grid-align: none;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt; mso-layout-grid-align: none;"><b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-size: 10pt;">(1) Imposing sanctions would not assist the person in conforming his or her future conduct to the requirements of these rules or other applicable law.</span></i></b></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt; mso-layout-grid-align: none;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt; mso-layout-grid-align: none;"><b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-size: 10pt;">(2) The purposes that would be served by imposing sanctions have been fully fulfilled;</span></i></b></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt; mso-layout-grid-align: none;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt; mso-layout-grid-align: none;"><b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-size: 10pt;">(3) The absence of imposing sanctions would be unlikely to pose a risk of harm to the interests or</span></i></b></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt; mso-layout-grid-align: none;"><b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-size: 10pt;">welfare of any recipient of services or potential recipient of services; and</span></i></b></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt; mso-layout-grid-align: none;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt; mso-layout-grid-align: none;"><b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-size: 10pt;">(4) The reasons supporting the decision not to impose sanctions outweigh any adverse impact on general deterrence or on public perception that may arise from the absence of sanctions.</span></i></b></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt; mso-layout-grid-align: none;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt; mso-layout-grid-align: none;"><b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-size: 10pt;">The Board finds that extenuating circumstances exist pursuant to Gal 503.01(e) in that, although Ms. Boehm made false statements to the Board in her application (Gal 402.03(b)(2)b, Ms. Boehm, in her testimony, reflected true remorse for her behavior, and an understanding of the significance of her wrong-doing. She did not attempt to place the blame on others or to make excuses for herself. Furthermore, she has been suspended from the practice of law for in excess of six months. The Board has taken these factors into consideration in issuing its order.</span></i></b></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt; mso-layout-grid-align: none;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt; mso-layout-grid-align: none;"><b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-size: 10pt;">IT IS THEREFORE ORDERED</span></i></b></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt; mso-layout-grid-align: none;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt; mso-layout-grid-align: none;"><b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-size: 10pt;">1. Lenora Boehm’s certification as a Guardian ad Litem is suspended for a period of 6 months from the date of this order, pursuant to Gal 402.01(a)(2)</span></i></b></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt; mso-layout-grid-align: none;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt; mso-layout-grid-align: none;"><b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-size: 10pt;">2. a fine of $500 is imposed on Lenora Boehm pursuant to Gal 402.01(a)(6), and</span></i></b></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt; mso-layout-grid-align: none;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt; mso-layout-grid-align: none;"><b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-size: 10pt;">3. Ms. Boehm shall notify all courts in which she is, or may hereafter be appointed as a</span></i></b></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt; mso-layout-grid-align: none;"><b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-size: 10pt;">guardian ad litem during the imposition of the suspension, copying all parties, of the Board’s order pursuant 503.16 (c).</span></i></b></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt; mso-layout-grid-align: none;"><br />
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In addition, read the Decision and Order from the GAL Board dated <a href="http://www.scribd.com/doc/74972007/Boehm-Decision-Order-5-2011" target="_blank">May 4, 2011</a><br />
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Thank you to our viewers for sending in your tips.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Please keep those tips coming in.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></div>Fighting Backhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10680648824756930269noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4340635590080462435.post-78432967606674954462011-12-22T21:36:00.001-05:002011-12-22T21:36:52.131-05:00Who Is Rinaldo Del Gallo, III, Esq. – From The Website Of Berkshire Fatherhood Coalition<h2>About Rinaldo Del Gallo <span style="font-size: small;"><a href="http://www.berkshirefatherhood.com/index.php?page=about_rinaldo" target="_blank">(From The Webite Of The Berkshire Fatherhood Coalition)</a></span></h2><div align="justify"><strong><img align="left" alt="" border="10" height="320px" hspace="10" src="http://i203.photobucket.com/albums/aa4/RinaldoDelGallo/RD.jpg" vspace="10" width="250px" /><span class="goog_qs-tidbit goog_qs-tidbit-0">Rinaldo Del Gallo, III, Esq.</span></strong><span class="goog_qs-tidbit goog_qs-tidbit-0"> is the spokesperson of the Berkshire Fatherhood Coalition. He has been practicing family law attorney and has been a member of the</span> Massachusetts bar since 1996. Mr. Del Gallo has handled a wide variety of family law cases including issues of child custody, child visitation, child support, restraining orders, grandparent visitation, contempt of family court, access to academic records, guardianship, allegations of abuse, criminal allegations related to domestic violence, disputes over the care of a child, and care and protection proceedings before the Department of Social Services. For years, he has hosted bi-monthly free legal seminars for people of any gender having problems in family court. On behalf of non-custodial parents, he has had made numerous media appearances in printed news, radio, and television. He has authored numerous family law related articles and columns. He has performed extensive <em>pro bono</em> work for fathers.<br />
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Attorney Del Gallo also has extensive experience as a civil rights attorney, working in the areas of free speech rights and ballot access. He was instrumental in protecting the City of Pittsfield from a zoning ordinance that would have allowed time-shares in any residential neighborhood, with a 15-page legal opinion that rebutted the assertion that time-shares was an impermissible regulation of ownership, not use, and thus was proscribed by law. This work was performed bro bono. <br />
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He is also an intellectual property attorney and a patent lawyer, and has written what is regarded as one of the most famous law reviews in the area of patent law, “<a href="http://www.idea.piercelaw.edu/articles/38/38_3/13.DelGallo.pdf">Are Methods of Doing Business Finally Out of Business As A Statutory Exception?</a>,” that helped end the so-called “business method exception,” which paved the way for an entire field of software and Internet related patents. <br />
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Attorney Del Gallo graduated from Northeastern University (Boston) with a Bachelor of Science degree in Electrical Engineering, and graduated from George Washington University (Washington) in the top of his three-year class. </div>Fighting Backhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10680648824756930269noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4340635590080462435.post-71644326186925459122011-12-22T21:36:00.000-05:002011-12-22T21:36:09.670-05:00Massachusetts Attorney Speak Of Issues With Family Courts – Rinaldo Del Gallo III Writes “An Open Letter To The Family Courts” – From The Website Of IntellectualConservitive.com<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt; mso-outline-level: 3; text-align: center;"><b><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15pt;">An Open Letter to the Family Courts</span></b></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt; text-align: center;"><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 10pt;">By Rinaldo Del Gallo III, on February 19th, 2007</span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: center;"><strong>A mother lives openly with her boyfriend while still married to her husband. Guess who gets awarded custody of their children?</strong> </div><span id="more-3260"></span><br />
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I will never forget one particular case that opened my eyes to the reality of the family court. It happened when I first started practicing family law in <state w:st="on"><place w:st="on">Massachusetts</place></state>. A mother wanted to divorce the father, who was a practicing Catholic. While still married to the father, the mother openly lived with a boyfriend with the children present, including an impressionable teenage girl. In pursuit of the free exercise of his religion, and making full use of his right to free expression, the father told his daughter that what his mother was doing was wrong and that adultery was a sin under the Catholic faith. During the course of litigation, the judge became especially angry when it was argued on the father's behalf that the environment created by the adulterous mother was not a good environment for children. New in the field, I was shocked that the father was lambasted for telling the child that adultery was bad, and that although the child should love and respect her mother, the daughter should understand that adultery was bad and a sin. To my shock and amazement the argument put forth was that father was "alienating" his daughter from the mother by making the daughter think less of the mother.<br />
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</div><div style="text-align: center;">As a newly practicing family law attorney the lesson I learned was quite clear: not only was the setting of a bad moral example for the child not a factor in determining the ‘fitness" of a parent and accordingly the "best interests of a child", but that the good-faith efforts of the other parent to morally instruct the child will be inevitably turned into an argument to be used against that parent under a theory of alienation.</div><div style="text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: center;">I have many fathers as clients in cases where the mother had children by three different men, is openly adulterous, openly lives with other men that have sex with her in her apartment where the children live, or where the mother exposes the child to lifestyles of swinging, homosexuality, or cross-dressing. I never bring these issues to the attention to the court because not only will the court view them as irrelevant, but will consider the considerations to be an attempt to embarrass the mother, rather than to be legitimate considerations in custody determinations. As to the areas of homosexuality or cross-dressing, the courts will turn such concerns into a beacon of the father's "intolerance." The culture wars have long since ended in the northeast courts of <state w:st="on"><place w:st="on">Massachusetts</place></state>. The secular side that rejects traditional Judaic-Christian has clearly emerged victorious and attorneys that champion traditional values had best sheath their swords, lest they waste their clients' money and run the risk of upsetting the court.</div><div style="text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: center;">This "rule" works hard on practicing conservative Christians and other people of faith who are wont to provide moral instruction for the child in an effort to counteract bad moral examples of the other parent. Consider: whether it is an effort to provide moral instruction when the child has been given the example of a not so secretive adulterous mother; or a stepfather that cross-dresses in front of the child; or a mother living with a man outside of marriage in the home of the child; or a swinging mom who constantly has new men in her bedroom in the same home where the child lives,.. a <state w:st="on"><place w:st="on">Massachusetts</place></state> judge will forcefully address the father with a stern lecture about not saying anything to the child that will diminish the child's esteem of the other parent. The father then not only has the impression that the courts are gender biased, but that they have embraced a moral universe that is not only at add odds with fundamental Judeo-Christian moral precepts regarding family life and sexual conduct, but is even hostile to the teaching of such values. When the father is already paying large amounts of child support and handing over a great amount of property in a marriage that was broken up in a large measure due to a mother's adulterous conduct, this last insult of assaulting the father's promotion of religious principles to the child in full view of the mother's misbehavior often causes the father, already put in the mood to the think the worst of the courts and judges, to believe that the court's anti-father bigotry is compounded by moral bankruptcy and hostility to conservative Judeo-Christian principles.</div><div style="text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: center;">Consider the evolution of adultery and our moral standards: One hundred years ago, the act of adultery, unbeknownst to the child, would have resulted in custody going to the non-offending parent because it was thought that as a matter of social policy, children should be raised by the parent better able to provide "moral values" and that the offended parent should not have the disgrace of adultery compounded with loss of the child. Fifty years ago, this trend seemed to change and when the mother committed adultery she would lose custody, if the child knew about the adultery. About twenty-five years ago, it did not matter that the children knew about the adultery, as long as it was not in front of the child. Today, adultery is given little weight, if any, unless there is actual sexual behavior in front of the child. Actually living together as man and women in an adulterous relationship, openly and notoriously, right in front of the children is not only ignored, the mere argument that such conduct should be considered as a grounds of unfitness has prompted angry oral commentary from the judges. As a practicing family law attorney in <state w:st="on"><place w:st="on">Massachusetts</place></state>, a socially very liberal state, I seldom discuss the mother's ability to be a moral example for her children because there appears to be an unstated policy that "the mother's sex life" is not relevant, even if the child is well aware of it.</div><div style="text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: center;">Older cases, early 20th century cases, routinely spoke of "temporal, mental and moral welfare," of the child. Some <state w:st="on">Mississippi</state> cases speak of "adultery's unwholesome influence and impairment of the child's best interest," but it is perhaps the last hold out state to even allow adultery to be considered, and <state w:st="on"><place w:st="on">Mississippi</place></state> case law is clear that the court need not consider adultery in child custody cases.</div><div style="text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman'; font-size: 12pt; mso-ansi-language: EN-US; mso-bidi-language: AR-SA; mso-fareast-font-family: 'Times New Roman'; mso-fareast-language: EN-US;">The change in the role of adultery in divorce, or sexual conduct in general, cannot possibly be understated. In the 18th and 19th centuries, a wife could lose dower (right to property) and the right to maintenance if she were the party that committed the divorce. Some cases had held since divorced voided the marriage as if it didn't happen, it bastardized the children. In some states (and some have argued under the common law) those convicted of adultery were barred from marrying again. The concept that an adulterous parent, father or mother, could obtain custody of children was thought preposterous. As for one parent actually saying the other parent's adultery is bad being used as a tool against them, such a concept was so unthinkable that it quite literally was beyond their imagination.</span></div>Fighting Backhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10680648824756930269noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4340635590080462435.post-30793255920501198642011-12-16T08:43:00.000-05:002011-12-16T08:43:16.691-05:00Dr. Richard A. Warshak Talks About Successfully Restored Relationships Between Parents And Alienated Children – When It Comes To Understanding Parental Alienation He Appears To Be Light Years Ahead Of The Family Court System - Parents And Children That Are Victims Of Parental Alienation Need To Go To Dr. Warshak’s Website And Learn From His Knowledge<h2><a href="about:blank" id="current" name="current"></a>Remedies for Alienated Children (<span style="font-size: small;"><a href="http://www.warshak.com/alienation/dpcc.html" target="_blank">From The Website Of Dr. Richard A. Warshak</a>)</span></h2><h3>Divorce Poison™ Antidote of the Month</h3><h4>Welcome Back, Pluto: Understanding, Preventing, and Overcoming Parental Alienation</h4>In terms of scope and potential to prevent and alleviate irrational alienation, this new DVD is more than an Antidote of the Month. Apart from the revised edition of<span class="italics_bold_blue"> Divorce Poison</span>,<span class="italics_bold_blue"> Welcome Back, Pluto</span> has been my major assignment for the past two years. It is the most powerful resource I can recommend for children who reject a parent or are being influenced to do so.<a href="http://www.warshak.com/alienation/pluto-dvd-2.html"><strong><em><span style="color: #637099;"> Read more.</span></em></strong></a><br />
<h2><a href="about:blank" id="success" name="success"></a>Successfully Restored Relationships</h2><h4>Hope for Future Reconciliation</h4>Despite their overt attitudes, many children who reject a parent secretly long for an excuse to reestablish contact. In addition to maturity, physically leaving the orbit of the favored parent, and becoming more psychologically independent, two situations that can form unexpected bridges to a reconciliation are:<br />
<ol><ol><li>growing conflict with the favored parent, and </li>
<li>financial dependence on the rejected parent. </li>
</ol></ol>In some families, for instance, children run into economic difficulty, such as needing funds for college, and this becomes the rationale for contacting the rejected parent.<br />
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This month’s antidote is an entirely new section in the DP Control Center: accounts of successfully restored parent-child relationships, often after years of no contact and often occurring totally out of the blue, just when a parent was about to give up hope of a reconciliation. This new section is properly considered an antidote to divorce poison because it is designed to counteract the discouragement and hopelessness that darkens the outlook of many alienated parents.<br />
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We launch this section with three entries: <br />
<ul><li><a href="http://www.warshak.com/alienation/dpcc.html#managing"><strong><em><span style="color: #004276;">a letter from a formerly alienated father, </span></em></strong></a></li>
<li><a href="http://www.warshak.com/alienation/dpcc.html#critical"><strong><em><span style="color: #004276;">a letter from a formerly alienated son, and </span></em></strong></a></li>
<li><a href="http://www.warshak.com/alienation/dpcc.html#advice"><strong><em><span style="color: #004276;">an interview with a formerly alienated daughter who is now a mother herself.</span></em></strong></a> </li>
</ul>New entry (added 6/17/2010): <a href="http://www.warshak.com/alienation/dpcc.html#moratorium"><strong><em><span style="color: #004276;">remarks from a formerly alienated mother</span></em></strong></a>.<br />
<h4><a href="about:blank" id="moratorium" name="moratorium"></a>Moratorium on Discussing the Past Helped Mother and Daughter Reunite</h4><br />
<a href="http://www.warshak.com/services/family-bridges.html"><strong><em><span style="color: #004276;">Family Bridges: A Workshop for Troubled and Alienated Parent-Child Relationships</span></em></strong></a> eases the transition when alienated children, teens, and young adults reunite with rejected parents. We find it helpful to the family to declare a moratorium on discussing the past. There are many reasons for this that I present in my peer-reviewed, <a href="http://www.warshak.com/alienation/publications.html#CR32" target="_blank"><strong><em><span style="color: #004276;">professional journal article</span></em></strong></a> that describes the program and its outcome in detail. The following note from a formerly alienated mother confirms the value of a mutual moratorium on discussing the past, however frustrating and counter-intuitive this may seem.<br />
<blockquote><em>"I am happy to report that after 4.5 years of complete/total rejection of me by my daughter (I did not see her or even speak with her during those years) - she did make contact with me when she turned 18 and left her Dad's house. That was 2 years ago - and we are now very close again and have re-built our relationship. I can smile again. </em><br />
<em>"Thank you so much for your book - it helped me identify what it was that was happening to my daughter during those dark heart-breaking years. Also - I wanted to mention one other thing - when my daughter came back - she and I made an agreement to not ever talk about the details of 'those years.' I think it's too painful for either of us. All she said was 'Mommy - I see the truth now.' And that was good enough for me! I did see (on your website) the section about '<a href="http://www.warshak.com/alienation/dpcc.html#archives"><strong><span style="color: #004276;">agreeing to disagree.</span></strong></a>' With us, we have taken it a step further - 'agreeing to totally avoid'! Maybe someday we can talk about those years, but I think she is at a loss for words to even try to explain how she could have treated me that way. (And it was beyond 'bad', believe me!)"</em></blockquote><h4><a href="about:blank" id="managing" name="managing"></a>Managing a Child's Return</h4>The following letter from a formerly alienated father gives hope to alienated parents who often feel hopeless about the future. This family’s experience supports my general recommendation that alienated parents do everything they can to convey to children that their door is open and that they will welcome the children back when the children change their minds and want to reconcile. No recriminations. No need to rehash the past. No demands for apologies or acknowledgement of wrongdoing. Accept the child back, show your love, let the healing occur gradually, and move forward with the relationship.<br />
<blockquote><em>"Since we last communicated I have had some new developments in my alienation case with my children. After consistently reaching out to my son and my daughter over more than seven years of not hearing one thing from them (despite the fact that they lived close by) I have been able to commence a reconnection with them.</em></blockquote><blockquote><em>"It seems to be related to the financial hardships their mother has had in the current economy and the fact that support payments stopped in the past year. My son has now all but moved out of her house and started to take some calls and meet me for an occasional meal. I then received a letter from my daughter apologizing for how rude she had treated me and extending an olive branch to meet. After a couple of visits with me this summer, my daughter apparently sensed increasing strain in the relationship with her mother and ended up asking if she could move back in with me."</em></blockquote>This father responded perfectly, making it comfortable for his daughter to reconcile. Read on:<br />
<blockquote><em>"I told her our home had always been hers, but then took the step of calling my ex (who otherwise is the last person on earth I'd ever want to talk to after what I've been through) and asked what was going on with our daughter. I wanted to make sure if she moved in with me that wouldn't cause new problems for their relationship. I got a story about how our daughter had gotten out of hand for her.</em></blockquote><blockquote><em>"My daughter did move in, about two months ago and it has been going fine. I feel like the number one focus I have is to gently ease back into a relationship with her. She is involved with a boyfriend, work and school and other normal things a child her age does. It just feels weird to me because when I last had any relationship with her she was seven years younger."</em></blockquote>Seven years of no contact, and the children returned to a father whose heart and home were open to them. Naturally, missing out on seven years of a parent-child relationship is tragic. But this family’s experience should give hope and inspiration to alienated parents who wonder if their children will ever return.<br />
<h4><a href="about:blank" id="critical" name="critical"></a> </h4><h4>Critical Thinking Leads to Reconciliation</h4><br />
One of the points I emphasize when working with alienated children is the importance of exercising critical thinking. The following letter illustrates how a young man corrected his distorted perceptions of his father by asking pointed questions about negative things he was told about his father, and by keeping an open mind. His letter illustrates the tragic loss for children and parents when a child is subjected to divorce poison. I hope parents will take heed and do a better job of protecting their children from such tragedy. The letter also gives hope to alienated parents because it is another illustration of how some children, when they mature, will exercise the courage to reach out to a rejected parent and struggle to see that parent through their own eyes instead of through the eyes of the other parent.<br />
<blockquote><em>"My brother, sister and myself were all subjects of Parent Alienation Disorder. This was long before it was ever heard of. I'm the youngest and I'm now in my mid-fifties. Me, being the youngest, I briefly saw my father only two or three times while growing up. I listened to a constant stream about how horrible he was and the terrible things he did from my mother. My sister wouldn't even see him on those few times he came to visit.</em></blockquote><blockquote><em>"I finally got to really meet my father when I was in my mid-20s. We initially spent about two weeks together. I listened to him for about the first week and then began asking him all the questions that had built up over the years. I asked very pointed questions regarding the stories that had been drilled into my head.</em></blockquote><blockquote><em>"I discovered that my father was very honest and not at all as my mother had painted him. Since then, he and I have developed a relationship. However, I still feel a deep loss from not having had time with my father growing up. The worst part are the deep scars left in my family. It would take a long time to explain those.</em></blockquote><blockquote><em>"My mother will still go into her ranting about how horrible my father is. She and I have slowly come to an understanding that I don't want to hear these negative stories anymore...Parental alienation has life-long effects. It tore my family apart and caused irreparable damages to the children involved."</em></blockquote><h4><a href="about:blank" id="advice" name="advice"></a>Advice to Rejected Parents from a Formerly Alienated Daughter</h4><div align="left">The following interview appeared in<a href="http://www.fnf.org.uk/news-and-events/mckenzie-newsletter" target="_blank"><strong><em><span style="color: #004276;"> McKenzie Magazine</span></em></strong></a> (issue #87, 2009, UK) which graciously granted permission to post it here. Sarah's responses make it clear how much is irretrievably lost when a child succumbs to divorce poison. > <a href="javascript:;"><strong><em><span style="color: #004276;">Read the article</span></em></strong></a>.</div><h1><a href="about:blank" id="archives" name="archives"></a>Divorce Poison Antidotes™ Archives</h1><h4>A Wake-up Call for Alienating Parents: The Tragedy of Divorce Poison</h4>I received the following letter from a man who wrote to thank me for my research on alienated children. He never expected to receive my response. When I asked for permission to reprint his letter on this site he responded the way most people do who have walked in the shoes of an alienated parent or child. He wrote: <br />
<blockquote><em>“I’d never imaged that a spontaneous email would end up being of a more enduring value than the simple feedback and note of appreciation that it originally was. It sort of provides a “sense of redemptive value” to me (Like the mother whose child is killed by a drunk driver who becomes a participant in M.A.D.D.) in that my comment may be read by and possibly benefit others. If it helps even one decision maker, or confused young person, see a fuller picture of the potential consequences of the actions they take along the lines of this issue then it will indeed have been of benefit.”</em></blockquote>This letter has two potential positive effects. First, I hope it will be a wake-up call to parents who require their children to take sides in parental disputes. When your children grow up they may realize and resent how you have manipulated them into losing a loving relationship with their other parent. When you read about the pain suffered by a child for whom it was too late to reconcile with his father, I hope this will allow you to see how your behavior is hurting your children and that you will want to change your ways in order to spare your child such pain. Second, I hope this letter will help judges, attorneys, and mental health professionals see why it is essential not to automatically endorse a child’s rejection of a parent. Although in some cases, particularly as a last resort, the least detrimental path will be to acquiesce to a child’s demands to avoid a parent, it is a mistake to do so automatically in order to “respect a child’s autonomy.”<br />
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This letter, <a class="read-more" href="http://www.warshak.com/divorce-poison/index.html"><strong><em><span style="color: #004276;">and others I receive</span></em></strong></a>, reveal the human tragedy behind the statistics and polemics about respecting children’s autonomy, and serve as a wake-up call to those who think they are helping children when they allow them to make life-altering decisions under extreme emotional duress and without the benefit of adult perspective and maturity. You can read more about the many hazards of relying on what children say they want when it comes to contact with parents in <a class="read-more" href="http://www.warshak.com/alienation/publications.html#CR28"><strong><em><span style="color: #004276;">Payoffs and Pitfalls of Listening to Children</span></em></strong></a>. When we have good reason to suspect that children speak in a voice that is not their own or that does not advance their best interests, we might take a clue from adults, such as the following, who look back on their childhood and judge the decisions made on their behalf.<br />
<blockquote><em>"My father passed away when I was about 21 years of age. I’d not developed enough yet to have seen through the brainwashing. I was overcome by an overwhelming sense of guilt and shame for not ever having spoken with my father before he died. The sense of sadness and grief I had concerning my father’s death transformed automatically into resentment of my mother who’d manipulated me the whole time seeking only to hurt her ex-husband and having no regard for my well being.</em></blockquote><blockquote><em>"I had not previously acknowledged to my mother or my father that I felt like a pawn in a game. When I was a child she had full custody-he had weekend visitation rights. She told me that if I ever spoke with him I would be tossed out of the house (I was 9 years old). So I’d simply submitted to my mother’s demands and her hate-filled propaganda. I’d never stood up for myself. I just let the new status quo she’d established be what it was.</em></blockquote><blockquote><em></em><br />
<em>"Then my father died. It wasn’t sudden but was over a two or three year illness. But he finally did pass, and when he did, for me, it was like going down the highway of life in a car named <span class="italics_bold_blue">denial</span> doing 90 miles an hour and then hitting the brick wall. I just woke up so suddenly out of the denial state to see clearly for the first time what had been going on. I did not present my feelings in an aggressive or even confrontational way to my mother. I did not even mention that I now felt resentful toward her. I only spoke about how guilty I felt that he’d died and I’d never told him that I loved him or even had a father/son conversation with him. I simply tried to explain how I felt. Her response, with a smug grin, was “Well — Hell knows no fury like a woman scorned.” The nearest clinical description that I can find, for the consequences burdened by me, is <span class="italics_bold_blue">betrayal trauma</span>.</em></blockquote><blockquote><em>"I just wanted to pass these thoughts along to you in case they are of any value in your research. I quite imagine you’ve already heard many such accounts before.</em>"</blockquote>Courts and legal and mental health professionals see convincing and compelling evidence of such callous disregard of a child’s needs by one or both parents intent on hurting the ex-spouse at the expense of the children. Being open to the voices of these children, when freed from the shackles of obeisance to a parent who fosters and supports alienation, may help more people see the wisdom of judges who interpret the law as offering children rescue and protection from such pressures, as well as encourage people to bring an open mind to new ideas about how to help relieve children’s suffering. Concern with the potential short-term distress for some (but not all) children who are required to repair a damaged relationship should not blind us to the long-term trauma, often hidden, of doing nothing.<br />
<h4> </h4><h4><a href="http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/content/article/2008/06/22/AR2008062202166_pf.html" target="_blank"><em><span style="color: #004276;">Carolyn Hax provides an excellent response to a mother whose 23-year-old daughter is estranged</span></em></a></h4><h4><b></b> </h4><h4><b>Agree to Disagree</b> </h4>One of the biggest impediments to reconciliation occurs when a child is convinced that a parent is guilty of a major transgression, such as child abuse, domestic violence, or alcoholism, and the parent adamantly denies guilt. Both sides insist that they are telling the truth. And each expects the other's agreement before they can have a relationship. <br />
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Professional negotiators table the most difficult issues until the end of the negotiations. The idea is achieve success with more modest goals, and then build on those successes. The same goes for reconciling with your children.<br />
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As much as possible, avoid arguments about whether or not you did the horrible things you are being accused of. Do not demand a resolution of this dispute when you are first trying to reunite with your child. I am not suggesting that you capitulate to your child's version of reality. Just table the discussion. Agree to disagree. <br />
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I cannot emphasize this enough. A premature attempt to resolve an explosive issue, particularly without the assistance of an experienced therapist, will not only meet with failure. It will blow up in your face, leaving a trail of destruction that makes the prospect of reconciliation even more remote. <br />
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For specific suggestions about how to implement this approach, including what to say to your children, see Chapter 7 on "Poison Control" in <a class="italics_bold_blue" href="http://www.warshak.com/alienation/dpcontents.htm"><em><b><span style="color: #004276; font-family: Arial,Helvetica;">Divorce Poison: Protecting the Parent-Child Bond From a Vindictive Ex.</span></b></em></a><br />
<blockquote></blockquote>On August 28, 2007, some cities will rerun an episode of <i class="italics_bold_blue">Everybody Loves Raymond</i> that will be of interest to visitors to the <strong>Divorce Poison™ Control Center</strong>. Episode #0313 is titled: <span class="italics_bold_blue">"Whose Side Are You On." </span>Here is the description from the show's web site: "After realizing that Debra places bets with the kids on his questionable behavior traits, Ray is disgusted that his own children now think he's a "doof." When reflecting upon his own childhood, Ray remembers that Marie used to complain about Frank in front of him all the time -- making him think his Dad was a loser. Concerned that his own kids will think of him the same way as Frank, Ray contemplates how to get the kids back on his side." <br />
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I have not seen this episode. But, I am grateful to the reader of <i class="italics_bold_blue"><a href="http://www.warshak.com/divorce-poison/index.html"><strong><span style="color: #004276;">Divorce Poison</span></strong></a></i> who brought this to my attention. She thought the show gives a good example of a tug of war for children's affection, even in a married couple. My reader added that this episode showed how one parent can portray the other parent in a negative light to children, even unintentionally. Watching shows such as this with your children can be a low-anxiety way of introducing themes relevant to children who feel caught in the middle of their parents' conflicts. Thanks to the DP reader who took the time to send this tip with the hope that it would help other alienated parents. <br />
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<h4>Persistence Pays Off - A Note that Provides Hope and Encouragement to Parents Who Despair of Ever Repairing The Damaged Relationship With Their Children</h4>It comes from a father who wrote to me for advice three years ago. In the face of his children’s rejection he was ready to throw in the towel. Instead, he continued to let his children know that he loved them, despite their lack of response to his cards, letters, and gifts. His persistence paid off. With his permission, I am reprinting a portion of his note. <br />
<blockquote><em><img alt="Quotation Marks." height="25px" src="http://www.warshak.com/images/all/quotation-marks-left-blue.gif" width="20px" />So I just want to say thank you for you kind wisdom and I guess if some father who is where I was a few years ago sought my advice, I know I would say to him that don't give up; always let your kids know you love them unconditionally. My oldest child had earlier referred to me by first name on a number of occasions but I never got mad; I was hurt; but for the sake of communication, I tried not to let it get in the way; both my children now call me Dad or Daddy and always sign their emails, Love [child’s name] and I can't express in words what that means to me.</em></blockquote><h4>Teaching About Different Perspectives - Letter from a Creative Mother </h4><blockquote><em><img alt="Quotation Marks." height="25px" src="http://www.warshak.com/images/all/quotation-marks-left-blue.gif" width="20px" />Hello Dr. Warshak, </em><br />
<em>I just had an amazing story that I wanted to share with you because I know you would appreciate how much it meant to me. I was talking to my daughter about a book that she and I are reading together at night before she goes to bed called "The Tale of Emily Winsnap". We were talking about a particular character in the story, and my daughter has been hypothesizing that this Mr. Beeston was a very bad person. I asked her if she was sure about that, and she replied, "well maybe not, are you trying to say it could be like "The True Story of the Three Little Pigs" and different perspectives?" When I heard that, I almost started to cry. We read that story over a year ago during the worst times of PAS. Kind of ironic that my pumpkin would bring that up right before the AP is taking me back to court for full custody again (this Tuesday). So I wanted to share this story because God does work in mysterious ways. For those parents who are being alienated, and trying to take the healthy ground of reuniting with their children, when it seems hopeless and dark, know that our children do listen, and a small seed is being planted in their minds and hearts. </em></blockquote><h4>Essay from a Mother: How Custody Battles Resemble Political Campaigns </h4><br />
I am pleased to share this well-written and well-conceived essay. I think it can help parents and children better understand how a parent's reputation with her children can be damaged unfairly, and why this occurs. <br />
<blockquote><em><img alt="Quotation Marks." height="25px" src="http://www.warshak.com/images/all/quotation-marks-left-blue.gif" width="20px" /></em>We all hate mud slinging in political campaigns, but it always seems to happen. Each candidate is attempting to convince the vote<em>rs that they are the best person for the job. They usually start out just talking about why they are a good candidate, but before long they give into the temptation to start talking about why they think the other candidate is not good for the job. They work to convince the voters that there is nothing good about their opponent. Even if the opponent has done something good, or has a good idea, they will attempt to discredit or find fault with the other's ideas and actions. They don't even have to tell lies. All they have to do is exaggerate negative points while minimizing positive points.</em></blockquote><blockquote><em></em><br />
<em>Regardless of the election's outcome, we are all relieved that the smear campaigns are finally over. Unfortunately there will occasionally be a looser who can't accept his loss, and will continue the mudslinging long after the election is over. </em></blockquote><blockquote><em>Ideally, when one candidate begins mudslinging, the other candidate should be "the better man", and not let his campaign sink to that level. Unfortunately, not fighting back or responding to the other candidate's attempts to ruin his reputation can backfire. Not responding to an accusation actually gives credit to it. Without any information to counter the false or misleading information given to them, the voters and general public begin to believe the bad remarks. If the smear campaigning goes on long enough, the negative images of the candidate can crowd out any positive images in the voters' minds. The voters will begin to have negative feelings about the candidate.</em></blockquote><blockquote><em></em><br />
<em>What I find interesting about this is how much it has in common with custody battles. Each parent is on a campaign to prove they are the best candidate for the office of "custodial parent". Ideally they should avoid smearing the other candidate, but the stakes are so high, they feel they have to do everything possible to win, even if they know it is wrong. They try to get all the "voters" to side with them, including the children. Sometimes they can't even see how it can harm their children. They think they are the best parent for their children, and winning custody is the best thing they can do for them. The ends seems to justify the means. The rest is just collateral damage.</em></blockquote><blockquote><em></em><br />
<em>When a parent is the victim of a smear campaign, they are advised to "take the high road", and not add to the fighting and mudslinging. The kids are the ones to get hit by the mud, so the less mud, the better. Unfortunately, they are not told how to shield the kids from the flying mud, and the kids get covered in it, even if only one parent is slinging it. The damage still occurs even though the target of the mud slinging kept their campaign clean. </em></blockquote><blockquote><em>It's time for this parent to publicly announce I am the victim of a smear campaign. I will continue to resist the urge to mud sling, especially in the presence of my children. I will, however, answer to the negative campaigning against me by giving truth to lies, and reality to deception. I will tell my children every day that I love them, and will not allow them to be harmed. I will do every thing possible to shield them from the mud, and to wash away the mud that has already hit them. I will limit my campaigning to the court room, where the only real voter presides. I will also ask my opponent to bury the hatchet for the sake of OUR children, and to become my ally in raising healthy, happy children. </em></blockquote><blockquote><em>These children need both their parents. No one wins this campaign if the children loose a parent in the process. They love both their parents, and should not be forced, manipulated, coerced, encouraged, or pressured to choose sides."</em></blockquote><h4><em>Boston Public</em> Episode Recommended by Alienated Mother </h4><blockquote><em><img alt="Quotation Marks." height="25px" src="http://www.warshak.com/images/all/quotation-marks-left-blue.gif" width="20px" />Since you are open to popular culture to educate people on <span class="italics_bold_blue"><a href="http://www.warshak.com/divorce-poison/index.html"><strong><span style="color: #004276;">Divorce Poison</span></strong></a></span>, I saw a dramatic episode of Boston Public where the high school daughter shares with her divorced parents (her father is the Principal) her pain and anguish that she is not part of a complete family. The segment dealt with some of the pain that the child feels even in a civil divorce. How much worse is it for children like mine who have spent most of their lives as the victims of a bitter, vindictive battle?"</em></blockquote><h4>Valuable Advice From a Mother About Working With Attorneys, Evaluators, and Therapists</h4><br />
I received an email from a mother who wanted to share some valuable lessons she learned while seeking help within the legal system. I think her advice can be very helpful to other parents in this difficult situation. This is especially true because there is some misinformation on the Internet that discourages alienated mothers from pursuing help within the legal system. Here it is: <br />
<blockquote><em><img alt="Quotation Marks." height="25px" src="http://www.warshak.com/images/all/quotation-marks-left-blue.gif" width="20px" />As a parent who has successfully fought Parental Alienation Syndrome within the legal system, and hopefully with the help of therapy and intervention a positive outcome will result in my relationship with my daughter, I would like to share some invaluable 'tools' that have helped me achieve this positive result. Please feel free to use this on your site. </em><br />
<blockquote><em>1. Obtain the best attorney that you can possibly afford. As I have told you, I had to go through 2 attorneys before hiring the correct one who could handle the whole case. I was fortunate to find this attorney through speaking to several reliable people, many who are attorneys or therapists, this attorney's name kept popping up. I had initially shyed away from using this attorney because of her very high retainer and hourly fees. However, by the time I lost custody and most visitation and it looked like I would have lost almost complete visitation I hired her and from that point on, was able to turn the tides. </em></blockquote></blockquote><blockquote><blockquote><em>2. Work very closely with all therapists involved, I was always very candid and honest. The other parent tried to keep me away from attending or taking my daughter to appointments with her therapist. The other parent presented his version of reality, in addition to my daughter's constant verbalization during therapy that I never did anything with her and she didn't want to see me again. I kept persistent contact with this therapist and insisted on taking my daughter in for half of her sessions despite the fact that it would take away from the few precious times I had visitation. I stayed calm and rational and always verbalized my concern for my daughter's emotional needs before all else. Listen to their recommendations, if you feel that they are not 'getting it,' try to explain your side of the story. Finally, after more than 6 months of my consistent behavior, the therapist realized that something was not quite right.</em></blockquote></blockquote><blockquote><blockquote><em></em><br />
<em>3. As you have pointed out, evaluators are hesitant to use the word alienation or Parental Alienation Syndrome. You are absolutely correct. When looking for attorney, therapists, evaluator, I was more concerned about their integrity and reputation of how good they were in their respective fields. In the end, the semantics do not matter, as long as the professionals have the capacity to see to it that the child's needs are met and have their pulse on the situation.</em> </blockquote></blockquote><blockquote><blockquote><em></em><br />
<em>4. Midway during another 'crisis' targeted by the alienating parent, I learned an invaluable lesson: to be proactive and not reactive in my relationship with the other parent. </em></blockquote></blockquote><blockquote><blockquote><em>5. Learn to take a breather and pace yourself, and surround yourself with friends and loved ones. </em></blockquote></blockquote><blockquote><blockquote><em>6. Most important, try to maintain some thread of contact with your child. </em></blockquote></blockquote><blockquote><em>I thank you for listening, and for all that you have done for us parents. I will keep you posted regarding my journey back with my daughter."</em></blockquote><strong>From Dr. Warshak</strong>: I thank you for taking the time to share your valuable insights with visitors to this site. I am sure we all wish you the best success in healing your relationship with your daughter. <br />
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<h4><em>Communication is always a problem with alienated children. A mother sent in this suggestion to open dialogue with reluctant children. If you try it, please let me know the results. </em></h4><blockquote><em><img alt="Quotation Marks." height="25px" src="http://www.warshak.com/images/all/quotation-marks-left-blue.gif" width="20px" />I would like to recommend, if you have never played <span class="italics_bold_blue">The Ungame</span>, a board game for positive family relationships, that you give it a try and see if you think it could help families dealing with <span class="italics_bold_blue"><a href="http://www.warshak.com/divorce-poison/index.html"><strong><span style="color: #004276;">Divorce Poison</span></strong></a></span>™.</em></blockquote><blockquote><em>I came across it in my quest to create a positive family environment where kids can talk freely and in an atmosphere of acceptance instead of judgment of their feelings, both positive and negative. </em></blockquote><blockquote><em>When we began the game the first time, all of the kids, ages 11-17, knew that I was up to my usual "family time" so there was a slight protest. However, after we got started we played for over two hours, way late into the evening and when we did quit, no one really wanted to. It almost seems like a silly game until everyone starts to get comfortable with their right to have and express their own feelings. The atmosphere became comfortable and safe for thoughts and feelings to flow. The rules of the game require folks to just be listeners at times, a hard task for many of us. I'm just a regular Mom dealing with the daily effects of <a href="http://www.warshak.com/divorce-poison/index.html"><strong><span style="color: #004276;">Divorce Poison</span></strong></a>. I know the frustrations and fears well. I hope <span class="italics_bold_blue">The Ungame</span> can help point other parents in the right direction for undoing a lot of damage." </em></blockquote><h4><em>My wife brought to my attention an article by Dr. Joyce Brothers.</em></h4>I think it could have an impact on young adults who have been alienated from a parent and is worth taking a look at. If you think it could persuade a long alienated child to reach out for contact, I suggest emailing the article to your child, or to a relative or friend who can show it to the child. I would welcome hearing from readers who found the article useful. <a href="http://www.parade.com/articles/editions/2004/edition_03-07-2004/featured_0" target="_blank"><strong><em><span style="color: #004276;">Click here to read the article.</span></em></strong></a> <br />
<h4><b></b><a href="about:blank" id="letter" name="letter"></a> </h4><h4>Letter That Kindled a Mother-Daughter Reconciliation</h4><br />
I thought the following letter needed to be shared with parents whose children are rejecting them. It was written as a "letting go" letter, as I recommend in chapter 9 of<span class="italics_bold_blue"> <i><a href="http://www.warshak.com/divorce-poison/index.html"><strong><span style="color: #004276;">Divorce Poison</span></strong></a></i></span><i>,</i> by a mother whose daughter had blamed her for the divorce and treated her horribly. The letter was written from the heart. It included specific memories of good times, reaffirmed the mother's love for her daughter, acknowledged the sadness of their current situation, and held out the hope for a better future.<br />
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What is especially rewarding about this letter is that, rather than marking the end of their relationship, it touched the girl's heart and was the catalyst that stimulated the process of healing the relationship. When the girl received it, she called her mother, thanked her for the art supplies, and said, "Love ya mom." When the mother gave permission to place the letter on divorcepoison.com she wrote, "If it helps even one parent in a similarly painful situation, I would be very pleased." So, here it is. It supports my view that alienated parents should not give up hope of a better future with their children. <br />
<blockquote><em><img alt="Quotation Marks." height="25px" src="http://www.warshak.com/images/all/quotation-marks-left-blue.gif" width="20px" />Dear Jane, </em><br />
<em>I love when you used to draw angels. Remember when we said thunder was Grandmother bowling up in heaven and when it was lightening she got a strike? </em></blockquote><blockquote><em>Remember how proud you were when you go so fast on your crutches after your broken ankle? Remember how we spent the night when you were in the hospital with mono? We talked all night about everything. </em></blockquote><blockquote><em>Jane, I love you unconditionally. I will always pray and hope for you to want to see me. But if you don't, I won't pressure you anymore to visit, call, etc. Maybe some day we can have a relationship again. </em></blockquote><blockquote><em>I hope you are letting all your bottled up creative energy out. You always showed your feelings through your music and sketches. I'm sending you a sketch pad and art supplies and a journal. I hope you get the urge to fill the empty places with your feelings and thoughts. </em></blockquote><blockquote><em>Part of me is empty and missing without you. I am very sad about us.</em></blockquote><blockquote><em></em><br />
<em>Remember when you made your famous "concoctions" in the kitchen? You got really good at chicken Parmesan. </em></blockquote><blockquote><em>I am very proud of you. I know you always give 100% effort to all you do. I know you will make the right choices in life. Know that I love you always, and think about you all the time! </em></blockquote><blockquote><em>Love, </em><br />
<em>Mom </em></blockquote><em>For parents whose children have remained out of touch for a long time:</em><br />
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A woman sent me the following analogy which I think can offer some comfort during the long period waiting for communication from an alienated child.<br />
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Treat your efforts to connect with your alienated child like a Mars lander project. Stay committed but somewhat detached — for years if necessary — with the goal of eliciting transmissions from alien soil. <br />
In her case, a letter sent to a child who has been alienated for years (now an adult) was the Mars lander. When the letter was delivered and signed for by the child, she wrote that, "The Mars lander has deployed.... Standing by for Martian storms... or electronic failure." <br />
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<b>Important note:</b> If you have no communication with a child, and you are making one last attempt to connect by mail, make sure that you send the letter by some means that allows you to verify that it was received. <br />
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Send <a href="http://www.warshak.com/divorce-poison/index.html"><em><span style="color: #004276;">Divorce Poison</span></em></a> Book to Adult Children<br />
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If you believe your children have been victims of divorce poison, and they are now adults and still refuse to have any contact with you, consider sending them a copy of the book, <a class="italics_bold_blue" href="http://www.warshak.com/divorce-poison/index.html"><strong><em><span style="color: #004276;">Divorce Poison</span></em></strong></a>, along with a heartfelt note. From what we are hearing from other parents in this situation, this may be the catalyst that begins the journey back from alienation. It may be a long shot. But what do you have to lose? <br />
<h4> </h4><h4>Teach Children to Solve, Rather Than Avoid, Relationship Difficulties</h4><br />
When you are a victim of divorce poison, and your child wants to end contact with you because it is "too stressful," point out to your child and your ex that avoiding difficulties in a relationship is a poor way to cope. Avoiding the problems, rather than solving them, will likely interfere with future relationships. <br />
<h4> </h4><h4>April 2nd is Ann Landers' Reconciliation Day. </h4><br />
Be sure to read her column, cut it out, and use it in the manner described in Chapter 7 of <a class="italics_bold_blue" href="http://www.warshak.com/divorce-poison/index.html"><b><span style="color: #004276; font-family: Arial,Helvetica;"><em>Divorce Poison: Protecting the Parent-Child Bond From a Vindictive Ex</em></span></b></a>.<br />
<h4> </h4><h4>Use Good-mouthing to Reduce Bad-Mouthing</h4><br />
Your best chance of reducing bad-mouthing may be to consistently acknowledge the specific things that your ex does for the children and express your appreciation. <i>Why?</i> It is more difficult to bad-mouth someone who frequently says nice things about you. <br />
<a href="http://www.warshak.com/alienation/busters.html"><span style="color: #004276;"><em><strong>Read Alienation Busters here.</strong></em></span></a>Fighting Backhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10680648824756930269noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4340635590080462435.post-6936787851609296062011-12-13T22:58:00.004-05:002011-12-13T23:01:50.519-05:00Second Wife to Judge: ‘Your Courts Are Destroying My Family’ (From The Fathers And Families Website)<h2><a href="http://www.fathersandfamilies.org/?p=22118" target="_blank">Second Wife to Judge: ‘Your Courts Are Destroying My Family’</a></h2><small><span style="font-family: Arial;">December 8th, 2011 by Robert Franklin, Esq.</span></small> <br />
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<div class="entry"><a href="http://www.nhinsider.com/letters-to-the-editor/author/haasfamily4"><span style="color: #990000;">This short entry</span></a> caught my eye (<em>NH Insider</em>, 12/6/11). Why wouldn’t it? It’s by a woman named Samantha Haas who asks a simple question, “why wouldn’t shared parenting be supported?” It turns out she’s the daughter of a divorced couple who did share parenting and she’s got some important ideas about the value it.<br />
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Here’s her piece in full.<br />
<blockquote>Children deserve the very best from BOTH parents. Parents have the Right to raise their children and make sure they are safe, educated, healthy and responsible.</blockquote><blockquote>If a parent of right mind understands the importance of both parents being equally involved with their children; then why wouldn’t that parent support it? </blockquote><blockquote>False allegations and domestic violence are far too common. And it happens by women and men, and now more than ever, the Family Courts turn the other cheek.<br />
<a name='more'></a></blockquote><blockquote>In my experience as a daughter of parents who divorced and SHARED PARENTING; it is truly the most important decision you can make for your children.</blockquote>You notice she’s unequivocal. To her, it’s the most important decision divorcing parents can make. Strong words, but she knows from experience.<br />
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Apart from her experience as a child of divorced parents, it turns out Haas has some hard-learned lessons about the parental side of divorce court. It seems her husband is a non-custodial father whose ex-wife has refused to allow him to see or contact his children for two years. Has he received any help whatsoever from the New Hampshire courts in dealing with that flagrant violation of his and his children’s rights? He has not.<br />
Into the bargain, the state child support agency screwed up the billing on his account. So he’s ended up paying far more than he should have, and is still behind. Has he received any help whatsoever from the New Hampshire courts in dealing with that flagrant abuse of his rights? He has not.<br />
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I’ll let Samantha Haas tell it. Here’s her letter to the Honorable Ed Kelly, judge of the court that should be doing something about her husband’s outrageous case, but apparently hasn’t.<br />
<blockquote>Honorable Ed Kelly;<br />
My name is Samantha Haas. I am a wife and mother from Hooksett, New Hampshire.<br />
Mr. Kelly, your Courts are destroying my family.</blockquote><blockquote>We have suffered severe emotional distress, financial hardship and estrangement from my two stepdaughters.</blockquote><blockquote>My husband was denied his right to Due Process as his Constitutional Rights have been violated and the essential base on the concept “fundamental fairness”. </blockquote><blockquote>A mathematical error in the Court on November 20th 2006 has followed my family ever since, with my husband always being held in contempt on an inability to pay.</blockquote><blockquote>Ignored or denied pleadings, a Guardian ad litem who withheld evidence of abuse on my husband and children by his ex-wife, turning into not seeing his two daughters since September 26th, 2009.</blockquote><blockquote>My husband has paid over $120,000 in child support in the last four years, has a $250,000 life insurance policy on his two daughters naming his ex-wife as the beneficiary, pays for the children’s medical and dental insurance, and pays for half of all uninsured medical and dental expenses.</blockquote><blockquote>Yet, he has not seen his daughters in two years.</blockquote><blockquote>Every attempt to see them has been blocked by his ex-wife, who has perjured your very Courts since 2006.</blockquote><blockquote>My husband and I have been damaged financially because of the ongoing litigation. We have been getting food at our local food pantry and are on the verge of bankruptcy.</blockquote><blockquote>I am a full time student and my husband works in fund accounting for towns and schools, and is also a Hooksett Town Official as a member of the Budget Committee.</blockquote><blockquote>On June 17th 2011, my husband was falsely incarcerated at Manchester Family Division on his inability to comply with paying for the mathematical error from 2006.</blockquote><blockquote>Mr. Kelly, I felt like I lost my life that day. It was Father’s day weekend and my son (Nicholas’ stepson) and our daughter were without their dad because he was in jail.</blockquote><blockquote>It became my responsibility to find $10,000 cash bail to have him released. It became my responsibility to fight for my husband’s freedom and his right to be a father and not be faulted for an error the court made.</blockquote><blockquote>We have filed with the Supreme Court. We continue to file with Manchester Family Division with no response.</blockquote><blockquote>Why? Why are we being denied our rights? Our rights as people and our rights as parents?<br />
Our family desperately needs relief, Mr. Kelly.</blockquote><blockquote>The longer this is allowed to continue, the older the children are getting and they already have a two year old sister they have never met.</blockquote><blockquote>Please show us what to do.</blockquote><blockquote>Respectfully;</blockquote><blockquote>Samantha & Nicholas Haas</blockquote>That’s about as good a summary of family law in the United States as I know of. It’s almost all there. The screw-up by the child support system resulting in payments he can’t make. The ever-increasing penalties. The inability to get the judge to care or pay attention. Impending bankruptcy. An ex-wife who perjures herself, a pro-mother guardian ad litem who withheld evidence. Refusal to enforce the visitation order. Depriving the children of their father indefinitely. And what must be counted the crowning achievement of the whole sorry affair, the father’s arrest on Fathers Day due to the court’s mistake.<br />
<br />
About the only thing missing is for the dad to learn he’s not the actual father and to be made to keep paying anyway.<br />
<br />
I hate to tell Ms. Haas, but she and her husband are far from alone in this. Similar things are happening to fathers all across America; it’s as common as dirt.<br />
<br />
If you wanted to design a system to separate fathers from children, you couldn’t do a lot better than the one we have. Earlier this year, and not too very far from where Mr. and Ms. Haas live, a distraught father walked up the courthouse steps, poured gasoline on himself and lit a match. I hope no one else ever does such a thing, but it is surely a measure of the disgrace that is our family court system that it happened.<br />
<br />
Listen to Samantha Haas: “Mr. Kelly, your courts are destroying my family.”<br />
<br />
Judge Kelly didn’t listen; she got no reply to her heartfelt and deeply moving letter. Nor has Kelly addressed in court the many issues she raised. A bankrupt family, children without a father and no end in sight. What an accomplishment.</div>Fighting Backhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10680648824756930269noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4340635590080462435.post-6163612250841936582011-12-11T21:46:00.000-05:002011-12-11T21:46:49.288-05:00Alienation Of Your Children Is A Tough Thing To Deal With During The Holiday Season - This Holiday Season Give Thanks To God For What You Have. Don’t Dwell On What You Have Lost – We Owe It To Our Children To Forgive And Be Strong<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">As I sat at the Thanksgiving table this year listening to the blessing, I found myself saying a silent prayer for my children.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">I didn’t dwell on the fact that my children’s minds were taken from me by a mother that knows no boundaries.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I didn’t find myself dwelling on everything that I lost.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I didn’t find myself thinking of how unfair life is.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Instead I found myself giving thanks to God for everything that I have.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">Many of us are fighting to change the family court system and are trying to make things fairer so that both parents can have equal parenting time.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The unfortunate thing is that this may take many years.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Many of our children may no longer be children when this happens.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>We will have missed out on the Thanksgivings and Christmases of their youth.</div><a name='more'></a><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">We all need to learn to deal with the tragedy of what we have lost so that we can stabilize what we have and work towards growing stronger and being better persons.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>We owe this to our children.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">The first step for me healing and being a better person was learning to forgive.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I have forgiven my ex-wife for what she has done me and to our children. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>In the end we will all die and meet our maker and have to answer to him.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It’s really not my job to judge her.</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">As I continued to sit at the Thanksgiving table I found myself silently giving additional thanks for the wonderful years I had with my children before my ex-wife poisoned their minds and turned them against me.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I found myself thinking of the wonderful things I did with my children in the past when they were proud to call me dad.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">For my oldest son I have one of the fondest memories of climbing Cathedral Ledge in <place w:st="on"><city w:st="on">North Conway</city>, <state w:st="on">NH</state></place>.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It was just the two of us hiking to the top.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>When we got to the top, we took a picture of the two of us together smiling at our accomplishment.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">For my youngest son, one of the fondest memories is when I use to call him “George the Monkey” from the Curios George books I would read to him and he would hold onto my hands, climb up me and tip himself upside down and just hang there like a monkey.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">Some other fond memories were of my two sons sitting on the top of Cathedral Ledge both of them together.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I have several pictures of them in the same place a few years in a row.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>To this day my computer desktop still bears one of those pictures.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">I truly am a lucky man.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I have memories of my children that no person can take from me.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>My ex-wife can destroy the present and the future but my wonderful past memories of our children is one thing she can’t destroy or take away from me.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">Some fathers don’t get to have the experiences I have had with my two sons.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Some fathers have lost their children prematurely to death at an early age and that is a true tragedy.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>My children however stressed things are between us are still alive and healthy.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I give thanks for this. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">I truly feel that God has a bigger goal in life for me.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I don’t believe God is punishing me but helping me to be a better and stronger person.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>In the past few years, there have been several parents that I have helped that have had their children alienated from them.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Maybe God intended this to happen to me so I would be compassionate to these people and I would learn to be helpful and patient.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Maybe it is something that I had to go through to be able to help others.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The truth is, no one but God really knows.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">This holiday season join me in healing and give thanks to God for what you have.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Don’t dwell on what you have lost.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>We owe it to our children to forgive and be strong.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Let your children know that your home and heart is always open to them.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></div>Fighting Backhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10680648824756930269noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4340635590080462435.post-429797208110643332011-12-08T22:08:00.000-05:002011-12-08T22:08:55.390-05:00Parental Alienation And Hostile Agressive Parenting Are Abuse<div class="postContents"><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-UzNNzBX_8uA/TsxTVevcltI/AAAAAAAAAEo/UpJgpbidHeo/s1600/boy2.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; cssfloat: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" hda="true" height="281px" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-UzNNzBX_8uA/TsxTVevcltI/AAAAAAAAAEo/UpJgpbidHeo/s400/boy2.jpg" width="400px" /></a></div><div _loaded="true" class="entirePost"><br />
</div></div>Fighting Backhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10680648824756930269noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4340635590080462435.post-17937126908446726742011-12-07T21:44:00.000-05:002011-12-07T21:44:15.562-05:00Blog Reaches 25,000 Page Views Today<span style="font-size: large;">Today the blog has recorded over 25,000 page views in a little over a year.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Wow!<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It's like a train picking up momentum. Once the train picks up speed don’t get in the way.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Get on board or be run over.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Be ethical when you are a public servant or be exposed by this blog.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-size: large;">There is so much corruption out there that needs to be exposed and we doing it.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-size: large;">We are reaching out to and informing lots of readers about issues involving Judicial Child Abuse and Neglect.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>We are exposing unethical abusers of the court system and proud of our work.</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;">Help to keep up the momentum.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Keep your tips coming in on unethical attorneys, GAL’s, Judges, Marital Masters or anyone else that is participating in Judicial Child Abuse or Judicial Child Neglect.</span><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Fighting Backhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10680648824756930269noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4340635590080462435.post-29408501267739832102011-12-06T20:21:00.000-05:002011-12-06T20:21:45.969-05:00A Letter From Samantha Haas On Shared Parenting<h2 class="title"><a class="journal-entry-navigation-current" href="http://www.nhinsider.com/letters-to-the-editor/2011/12/6/shared-parenting-in-new-hampshire-why-wouldnt-it-be-supporte.html">Shared Parenting in New Hampshire. Why wouldn't it be Supported?</a> </h2><div class="journal-entry-tag journal-entry-tag-post-title"><span class="posted-on"><img alt="Date" class="inline-icon date-icon" rel="smalllight" src="http://www.nhinsider.com/universal/images/transparent.png" title="Date" />Tuesday, December 6, 2011 at 05:25PM</span></div><div class="journal-entry-tag journal-entry-tag-post-title"><span class="posted-on"></span> </div><div class="body">Children deserve the very best from BOTH parents. Parents have the Right to raise their children and make sure they are safe, educated, healthy and responsible.<br />
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If a parent of right mind understands the importance of both parents being equally involved with their children; then why wouldn't that parent support it?<br />
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False allegations and domestic violence are far too common. And it happens by women and men, and now more than ever, the Family Courts turn the other cheek.<br />
<br />
In my experience as a daughter of parents who divorced and SHARED PARENTING; it is truly the most important decision you can make for your children.</div>Fighting Backhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10680648824756930269noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4340635590080462435.post-74340931597627908192011-12-05T09:04:00.000-05:002011-12-05T09:04:37.423-05:00Victory—In Face of Opposition, Leahy Scraps VAWA Draft Provision Which Lowers Evidence Standards - From The "Fathers And Families" Website<h2>Victory—In Face of Opposition, Leahy Scraps VAWA Draft Provision Which Lowers Evidence Standards</h2><small><span style="font-family: Arial;">November 16th, 2011 by Glenn Sacks, MA, Executive Director</span></small> <br />
<br />
<div class="entry">False allegations of abuse are common in family court, and have been used to separate many fathers (and some mothers) from their children. The reasons for this problem are many, but one of the biggest is the low evidence standard for upholding abuse claims.<br />
<br />
The common evidence standard for domestic violence restraining orders is “preponderance of the evidence,” often conceptualized as a mere 51/49% likelihood of guilt. By contrast, when someone seeks a civil restraining order, the more stringent and appropriate “clear and convincing” evidence standard is used.<br />
<br />
In practice, this means that when neighbors Bob and Jim have a dispute over Bob’s dog eating Jim’s flowers, and Jim allegedly threatens to throw rocks at Bob’s dog, the courts demand that Bob provide solid evidence to support his claims of Jim’s threats. By stark contrast, if Bob’s wife decides to divorce him and seeks to throw him out of his house on a restraining order and cut him off from his kids, she has a much lower burden of proof on her claims.<br />
<a name='more'></a><br />
Fathers and Families wants abused women (and men) to be afforded the protection they need. However, we have relentlessly publicized and fought the common problem of false allegations being used as child custody and financial maneuvers in divorce. And one of the key components in this fight is to replace the “preponderance” standard with the “clear and convincing” standard.<br />
<br />
<strong>VAWA Re-Authorization Sought to Lower Evidence Standards</strong><br />
Recently there have been moves by the Obama administration to lower the evidence standard that universities and colleges use to adjudicate accusations of violence or abuse. According to Hans Bader, Esq.:<br />
<div style="padding-left: 30px;"><br />
</div><div style="padding-left: 30px;">Historically, most colleges used a “clear and convincing” evidence standard in student and faculty discipline cases…this due process safeguard has come under attack, most prominently [by]…the head of the U.S. Department of Education’s Office for Civil Rights, Russlyn Ali, who has demanded that colleges dilute the presumption of innocence in sexual harassment and assault cases by instead using a “preponderance of the evidence” standard…</div><div style="padding-left: 30px;"><br />
</div><div style="padding-left: 30px;">Now, the Senate draft bill to reauthorize the Violence Against Women Act [by Senator Patrick Leahy (D-VT)] has inexplicably sought to expand the assault on due process. The draft VAWA bill would give OCR the power to set the “standard of proof” not only in harassment and rape cases, but also in other kinds of cases like “domestic violence,” “stalking,” and inappropriate behavior in dating relationships.</div><br />
<strong>A Firestorm of Protest</strong><br />
Colleges and universities have often victimized innocent male students by validating spurious abuse or assault charges, as Fathers and Families Board Member Robert Franklin, Esq. details <a href="http://www.fathersandfamilies.org/?p=21183"><span style="color: #990000;">here.</span></a> Franklin explains:<br />
<div style="padding-left: 30px;"><br />
</div><div style="padding-left: 30px;">The new standard has been met with a firestorm of protest. The American Association of University Professors, the National Association of Scholars and the Foundation for Individual Rights in Education all came out against the measure. Nationwide, some 30 editorials did as well.</div><div style="padding-left: 30px;"><br />
</div><div style="padding-left: 30px;">As it stands, all colleges and universities must now use the lower standard or face the loss of federal funding. But what’s been done by bureaucratic fiat can be undone in the same way.</div><div style="padding-left: 30px;"><br />
</div><div style="padding-left: 30px;">But Leahy’s proposed bill to reauthorize the Violence Against Women Act would have made the lower standard a requirement of federal law, and, had it passed, it would have taken another act of Congress to undo.</div><div style="padding-left: 30px;"><br />
</div>The good news is that Leahy has now scrapped these provisions in his VAWA draft in the face of these protests. We thank and congratulate all who were involved in opposing this harmful provision. To learn more, see Franklin’s post <a href="http://www.fathersandfamilies.org/?p=21183"><span style="color: #990000;">here</span></a> and Bader’s article <a href="http://www.openmarket.org/2011/10/24/senate-bill-would-further-undermine-due-process-on-campus/"><span style="color: #990000;">here</span></a>.</div>Fighting Backhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10680648824756930269noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4340635590080462435.post-44093164596557729802011-12-02T13:32:00.000-05:002011-12-02T13:32:39.078-05:00OK Legislator Blasts Family Law System; F & F’s Gregory Tells Committee ‘We Need Shared Parenting’ - From The "Fathers And Families" Website<h2>OK Legislator Blasts Family Law System; F & F’s Gregory Tells Committee ‘We Need Shared Parenting’</h2><small><span style="font-family: Arial;">November 8th, 2011 by Glenn Sacks, MA, Executive Director</span></small> <br />
<div class="entry"><div class="wp-caption alignright" id="attachment_20946" style="width: 260px;"><a href="http://www.fathersandfamilies.org/wp-content/uploads/2011/11/Jason-Nelson-Oklahoma-Rep..png"><img alt="" class="size-full wp-image-20946" height="207px" src="http://www.fathersandfamilies.org/wp-content/uploads/2011/11/Jason-Nelson-Oklahoma-Rep..png" style="margin: 10px;" title="Jason Nelson Oklahoma Rep." width="250px" /></a> <br />
<div class="wp-caption-text">An adult child of divorce, Rep. Jason Nelson criticized the courts for marginalizing his father.</div></div><br />
Fathers and Families member Chris Gregory, a Marine combat veteran of Desert Storm and Somalia, recently told an Oklahoma House of Representatives committee that the family law system is rife with injustices and often separates children from the fathers they love and need.<br />
<br />
Led by Representative Mark McCullough and Representative Jason Nelson, the Oklahoma House of Representatives conducted an interim study on family law and no fault divorce earlier this month. According to the legislators’ press release <a href="http://www.okhouse.gov/okhousemedia/News_Story.aspx?NewsID=4131"><span style="color: #990000;">here</span></a>, “Oklahoma’s family law is dangerously failing the children it is supposed to protect, leading some lawmakers to consider reform of both divorce statutes and the foster-care system.”<br />
<br />
<strong></strong> <br />
<a name='more'></a>Oklahoma Legislator Blasts Family Law System<br />
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Representative Nelson (R-Oklahoma City), a child of divorce, said:<br />
<div style="padding-left: 30px;"><br />
</div><div style="padding-left: 30px;">[O]ur current divorce system is a racket that enriches attorneys and makes children and communities poorer. Divorce scars children and leaves them emotionally disfigured. The current divorce laws are perverse and they are destroying children and our society.</div><br />
Representative Nelson spoke movingly about his childhood and watching the pain on his father’s face at not being allowed to spend much time with his son, as well as the financial privations the system put upon him. Nelson concluded with a call for a presumption of shared parenting after divorce.<br />
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<strong>The Chris Gregory Case–an Outrageous but Common Injustice</strong> <div class="wp-caption alignright" style="width: 260px;"><img alt="" class=" " height="257px" src="http://www.fathersandfamilies.org/wp-content/uploads/2011/04/Chris-Gregory-in-dress-blues.png" style="border-bottom: black 1px solid; border-left: black 1px solid; border-right: black 1px solid; border-top: black 1px solid; margin: 10px;" width="250px" /> <br />
<div class="wp-caption-text">Former Marine Chris Gregory, recipient of the Combat Action Ribbon, told the Committee, 'We need shared parenting.'</div></div><br />
F & F’s Chris Gregory, the father of three girls who adore their dad, had a standard child custody order forced upon him—an order which granted his ex-wife “exclusive care, custody, and control of the parties’ minor children,” and allows Gregory’s girls only a few days a month with their father.<br />
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For the past three years, Gregory has fought in court to get more time with his girls, ages 11, 9, and 6. He has racked up large legal bills, as he was forced to pay for his ex-wife’s attorney—an attorney whose focus has been to minimize Gregory’s role in his children’s lives. He explains:<br />
<div style="padding-left: 30px;"><br />
</div><div style="padding-left: 30px;">The court has denied all of my motions to modify custody or seek an equitable outcome.</div><br />
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<strong>Financial Plunder</strong><br />
<br />
Gregory, who was asked by Representative McCullough to share his experiences with the divorce system, is a good example of the way fathers are plundered financially.<br />
<a href="http://www.fathersandfamilies.org/wp-content/uploads/2011/11/enews-20111109.l3.jpg"><img alt="" class="alignright size-full wp-image-21110" height="350px" src="http://www.fathersandfamilies.org/wp-content/uploads/2011/11/enews-20111109.l3.jpg" style="border-bottom: black 1px solid; border-left: black 1px solid; border-right: black 1px solid; border-top: black 1px solid; margin: 10px;" title="enews-20111109.l3" width="200px" /></a><br />
The financial orders in Gregory’s case are more or less garden variety in a divorce, yet while Gregory earns $7,500 a month after taxes, by court orders he is to be left with merely $2,200 a month to live on. That’s correct–family court leaves Gregory less with <em>less than 30% of his post-tax income. </em>The breakdown is as follows:<br />
<div style="padding-left: 30px;"><br />
</div><div style="padding-left: 30px;">Gregory’s monthly earnings after taxes: <strong>$7,518</strong><br />
Gregory’s child support: $2,568<br />
Gregory’s alimony: $1,000<br />
Gregory’s garnishment to pay his ex-wife’s attorneys’ fees: $1,726<br />
Total left to Gregory post-family court and taxes: <strong>$2,224*</strong></div><br />
According to the family court, Gregory, a successful Senior Consultant at a major software company who earns a $125K a year salary, should be left with a mere $26,688 a year to support himself and his three girls.<br />
<div class="wp-caption alignright" style="width: 260px;"><a href="http://www.fathersandfamilies.org/wp-content/uploads/2011/04/Chris-Gregory-Pay-Stub-11-08-11.pdf"><img alt="" class=" " height="233px" src="http://www.fathersandfamilies.org/wp-content/uploads/2011/04/Chris-Gregory-Pay-Stub-snapshot.jpg" style="border-bottom: black 1px solid; border-left: black 1px solid; border-right: black 1px solid; border-top: black 1px solid; margin: 10px;" width="250px" /></a> <br />
<div class="wp-caption-text">After divorce-related garnishments and further obligations, Chris Gregory is left with less than 30% of his post-tax income. For details, click on the image above.</div></div><br />
The child support and the attorneys’ fees are garnisheed directly from Gregory’s check. The $1,000 a month alimony is not, Gregory has not been paying it lately, and faces a contempt charge for it. As in many divorce cases, the attorneys’ fees Gregory owes grew out of his fight to be allowed to play a meaningful role in his children’s lives.<br />
<br />
Gregory also got stuck with paying 90% of the $69,000 in marital debt. Gregory asked:<br />
<div style="padding-left: 30px;"><br />
</div><div style="padding-left: 30px;">If this is a no fault divorce, why have I had to I assume all the fault?</div><div style="padding-left: 30px;"><br />
</div>As is the case with many divorced and separated fathers, Gregory’s daughters’ schools have been generally uncooperative, refusing to send him his daughters’ report cards and notices of parent-teacher conferences and other upcoming events, despite his repeated requests that they do so.<br />
<br />
*In the original post we inadvertently omitted a few hundred dollars a month of expenses not related to family court. The figure has now been corrected.</div>Fighting Backhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10680648824756930269noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4340635590080462435.post-20552580733884128192011-11-30T08:43:00.000-05:002011-11-30T08:43:06.149-05:00Who In The World Is Ed Mosca? - From The Website Of NH Corruption Watch<h3 class="post-title entry-title"><a href="http://nhcorruptionwatch.blogspot.com/2011/10/who-in-world-is-ed-mosca.html">Who in the world is Ed Mosca?</a> </h3><div class="post-header"><div class="post-header-line-1"></div></div><div class="post-body entry-content" id="post-body-7820628973766707437"><div style="background-color: transparent;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Cambria;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: 15px; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span></span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Cambria;">Just who is Ed Mosca? Well, a quick glance at his caseload will reveal that he is not in very high demand as a lawyer. He typically handles N.H. Bar referrals of low-income litigants typically fighting for "big purses." He often works on contingency and a look into some of his motion practice, reveals that he is apparently not very intelligent.</span><br />
<br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Cambria;">One of his former clients reports that he "bailed out" at the last minute before a hearing, leaving the client "high and dry." This type of unethical behavior is evidently not uncharacteristic of Ed Mosca.</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Cambria;"><br />
In another case, apparently Ed Mosca has engaged in unethical behavior that has put him on the hot-seat before a Family Court for alleged contempt practices and violations of the N.H. Professional Rules of Conduct.</span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Cambria;"><br />
</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Cambria;">Now, as counsel to the N.H. General Court, Ed Mosca has apparently brought his inane and disingenuous antics to the State House.</span><br />
<br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Cambria;">N.H. Corruption Watch will be keeping a close eye on Ed Mosca, and will be sharing its findings relative to his practices and conduct as information become available.</span><br />
<br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Cambria;">In the mean time, email nh.corruption.watch@gmail.com.</span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Cambria;"><br />
</span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Cambria;">Eric Davidson</span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Cambria;">N.H. Corruption Watch</span></div></div>Fighting Backhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10680648824756930269noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4340635590080462435.post-68966849833475102042011-11-30T08:26:00.000-05:002011-11-30T08:26:04.407-05:00House Counsel Ed Mosca Arrives Unprepared, Abets judicial child abuse (From The Judicial Child Abuse Blog)<h2 class="date-header"><span style="color: #222222;">Sunday, November 6, 2011</span></h2><div class="date-posts"><div class="post-outer"><div class="post hentry"><a href="about:blank" name="4329294169032843368"></a><br />
<h3 class="post-title entry-title">House Counsel Ed Mosca Arrives Unprepared, Abets judicial child abuse </h3><div class="post-header"><div class="post-header-line-1"></div></div><div class="post-body entry-content" id="post-body-4329294169032843368">The following letter was sent to the N.H. House Judiciary Committee on Nov. 5, 2011 and was obtained by STOP Judicial Child Abuse investigators.<br />
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Apparently, house counsel Ed Mosca arrived unprepared to adequately advise the Judiciary Sub-committee at a hearing on Tues., Nov. 1, 2011 forcing the sub-committee to reconvene for another hearing approximately a month later - <b>all while hundreds, if not thousands of children remain estranged from fit parents</b>.<br />
<br />
Read the letter below, reproduced in blue.<br />
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<br />
<br />
<div style="color: blue;">Nov. 5, 2011 </div><div style="color: blue;"><br />
</div><span style="color: blue;">Dear Honorable Judiciary Committee Representatives,</span><br />
<br />
<span style="color: blue;">Below, I have prepared a quick research memorandum of law, which will hopefully answer your question as to whether a "marital master is a judicial officer under the N.H. Constitution." I was present at the hearing this past week on HR7 and there seemed to be a problem extracting definitive answers from house counsel Edward Mosca. He did not arrive prepared (no handouts, no answers, etc.) and brought no binding authority (case law, etc.). I am merely a concerned citizen, bringing these answers to you.</span><br />
<a name='more'></a><br />
<span style="color: blue;">First, let it be known, I personally desire every under-performing, mal-administering, and corrupt judge and marital master removed forthwith, but my first loyalty is to the constitution, irrespective of whether it is favorable to me or not in a particular instance. </span><br />
<br />
<span style="color: blue;">I am disappointed by what I have to report to you, as it goes against my desire to impeach marital masters. The Supreme Court does not consider marital masters judicial officers pursuant to the N.H. Constitution.</span><br />
<br />
<span style="color: blue;"> In support thereof: </span><br />
<br />
<span style="color: blue;">1) "I. Are presently sitting marital masters judicial officers under Part II, Article 46 of the New Hampshire Constitution?"</span><br />
<br />
<span style="color: blue;">Opinion of the Justices, 128 N.H. 17, p.19 (1986). As of the date of this email, the Shepard's Report indicates that this case is still good law in New Hampshire.</span><br />
<br />
<span style="color: blue;">Beginning further down p.19, the Supreme Court of New Hampshire reasoned "Presently appointed marital masters of the superior court are not judicial officers within the meaning of part II, article 46 (Supp. 1985) of the Constitution of New Hampshire, and we accordingly answer no to your first question.</span><br />
<br />
<span style="color: blue;">A necessary characteristic of a judicial officer is the authority to render judgment to determine issues that are properly raised before the judicial branch. See The State of Rhode Island v. The State of Massachusetts, 37 U.S. (12 Pet.) 657, 718 (1838); N.H. Const. pt. I, art. 37, pt. II, art. 72-a. That final authority may be exercised only by an officer appointed in accordance with the State Constitution and invested with the constitutional incidents of judicial office. Thus, a judicial officer within the meaning of part II, article 46 (Supp. 1985) must, by definition, be "nominated and appointed by the governor and council," id., and must be commissioned to hold office during good behavior, N.H. Const. pt. II, art. 73, except where the constitution otherwise provides. See N.H. Const. pt. II, art. 75 (five-year term for justices of the peace); see also Northern Pipeline Co. v. Marathon Pipe Line Co., 458 U.S. 50 (1982).</span><br />
<br />
<span style="color: blue;">Marital and other masters are not so appointed, tenured or empowered. See generally R. Wiebusch, 5 New Hampshire Practice, Civil Practice and Procedure chap. 39 (1984). They are appointed by the superior court, and although their appointments are made and reviewed on a periodic basis, they have no tenure and are removable by the court at will. At most, such masters are authorized to make recommendations, which, though normally approved, have no binding force upon the court. But see Cornforth v. Cornforth, 123 N.H. 61, 455 A.2d 1049 (1983) (in absence of record, court may not alter master's recommended award without hearing or presentation of evidence)."</span><br />
<br />
<span style="color: blue;">A question could be raised "The year 1984 was nearly 28 year ago. Has the criteria for 'judicial officials' under the N.H. Constitution changed in the ensuing years?" A historical review of Pt.2 Art.46 of the N.H. Constitution reveals that it has survived four eras in New Hampshire History: The first was June 2, 1784, The second, it was amended in 1792 making minor changes in wording, the third, it was amended in 1877 deleting solicitors and sheriffs from those appointed by governor and council, and finally, the last era began in 1976 when it was amended deleting appointment of coroners by governor and council.</span><br />
<br />
<span style="color: blue;">The answer as to whether the criteria for "judicial officers" has changed in the past 28 years, appears to be "no, it has not."</span><br />
<br />
<span style="color: blue;">2) In addressing questions posed by the legislature relative to HB 236, the N.H. Supreme Court ruled similarly in Opinion of the Justices (Recommendations of Marital Masters), 155 N.H. 524 (N.H. 2007)</span><br />
<br />
<span style="color: blue;">3) In addressing questions posed relative to SB 112, the Supreme Court of New Hampshire held(in pertinent part) in OPINION OF THE JUSTICES RECOMMENDATIONS OF MARITAL MASTERS v. OPINION OF THE JUSTICES (RECOMMENDATIONS OF MARITAL MASTERS)., Request of the Senate No. 2007-263., May 30, 2007:</span><br />
<br />
<span style="color: blue;">"Although marital masters provide invaluable service to the judicial branch and the citizens of the state, we conclude that they are not judicial officers within the meaning of Part II, Articles 46 and 73 of the New Hampshire Constitution."</span><br />
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<span style="color: blue;">4) In Witte v. Justices of the N.H. Superior Court, 831 F.2d 362 (1987), the United States Court of Appeals for the First Circuit held that marital masters in New Hampshire 'have no inherent power, but rather derive all their power from the appointing judge or from the agreement of the parties.'</span><br />
<br />
<span style="color: blue;">"Plaintiff proceeds as if marital masters have the authority, over the objection of the parties, to finally determine cases. They do not. Rather, they may only make recommendations, and the recommendations have "no binding force upon the court." Opinion of the Justices, 128 N.H. 17, 20, 509 A.2d 746, 748 (1986).</span><br />
<br />
<span style="color: blue;">Masters have no inherent power, but rather derive all their power from the appointing judge or from the agreement of the parties. See N.H. Rev. Stat. Ann. § 519:9; R. Wiebusch, 5 New Hampshire Civil Practice and Procedure § 1371 (1984). And masters are required to file a report with the court for the court's action thereon.</span><br />
<br />
<span style="color: blue;">N.H. Rev. Stat. Ann. § 519:10; Rules of the Superior Court of New Hampshire 84 (report of master to be presented to presiding judge for judge's order). Upon request by either party, masters must "state specifically all matters of fact found by them to have been proved, and their rulings upon all questions of law." N.H. Rev. Stat. Ann. § 519:11. The judge, after reviewing the report, may accept it, recommit the case to the master for further proceedings, or hold further evidentiary hearing himself. N.H. Rev. Stat. Ann. § 519:12; Cornforth v. Cornforth, 123 N.H. 61, 64, 455 A.2d 1049, 1051 (1983). After the judge enters a final judgment, the parties may seek review of the judgment from the New Hampshire Supreme Court. Thus, under the marital master system, it is a judge, not a master, which determines the case."</span><br />
<br />
<span style="color: blue;">I hope that these findings are of assistance, and will help to save our valuable commodity; time. I ask once again why house counsel could not have prepared a simple memorandum like this for the edification of the Judiciary Subcommittee at the HR7 hearing last Tuesday? It seems inexcusable, considering his position as house "counsel" and the value of his contract.</span><br />
<br />
<span style="color: blue;">Representatives, just because a marital master may not meet the litmus test of "judicial officer," does not mean that they are off the hook. A recommendation should be made by this committee to the judiciary to terminate Philip Cross immediately - something you have the power to do. The onus is upon the Judiciary to act - and to fire Cross immediately - but the impetus must come from you!</span><br />
<br />
<span style="color: blue;">Furthermore, I believe this finding can be looked at in a positive light; now we can address the impeachable "judicial officers," the "judges of the state," who perfunctorily and recklessly sign marital masters' "recommendations" without thoroughly reviewing them, in true "rubber stamp" fashion. HR7 addresses not only Philip Cross, but any other superior court "officer." </span><br />
<br />
<span style="color: blue;">In high regard,</span><br />
<br />
<span style="color: blue;">Concerned Citizen</span> </div></div></div></div>Fighting Backhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10680648824756930269noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4340635590080462435.post-3274847688929015112011-11-28T22:23:00.001-05:002011-11-28T22:31:25.762-05:00McKenzie Magazine: An Interview With A Victim Of Parental Alienation - Victim Tells Parents "Don't Ever Give Up"<h2 style="line-height: 16.5pt; margin: 18.75pt 0in 7.5pt;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="color: #cc3300;"><span style="background-color: #d5e0d5;"><strong><span style="font-family: Arial;"><em><span style="background-color: white; color: #333333; font-size: x-small;"><a href="http://www.warshak.com/alienation/articles/alienation-interview.html" target="_blank"> From the website of Dr. Richard A. Warshak</a></span></em></span></strong></span></span></span></h2><h2 style="line-height: 16.5pt; margin: 18.75pt 0in 7.5pt;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="color: #cc3300;"><span style="background-color: #d5e0d5;"><strong><span style="font-family: Arial;">McKenzie Magazine: An interview with a victim of parental alienation</span></strong></span></span></span></h2><div class="MsoNormal" style="background: white; line-height: 16.5pt; margin: 0in 22.5pt 0pt; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto; text-align: justify;"><em><span style="color: #333333; font-family: Arial; font-size: 9pt;">The following interview appeared in<a href="http://www.fnf.org.uk/news-and-events/mckenzie-newsletter" target="_blank"><span style="font-family: Georgia;"><span style="color: black;"> McKenzie Magazine</span></span></a> (issue #87, 2009, <country-region w:st="on"><place w:st="on">UK</place></country-region>) which graciously granted permission to post it here. Sarah's responses make it clear how much is irretrievably lost when a child succumbs to divorce poison.</span></em></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="background: white; line-height: 16.5pt; margin: 0in 22.5pt 0pt; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto; text-align: justify;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="background: white; line-height: 16.5pt; margin: 0in 22.5pt 0pt; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto; text-align: justify;"><span style="color: #333333; font-family: Arial; font-size: 9pt;">McKenzie: Now an adult mother, Sarah was alienated from her father by her abusive mother and did not see him from the age of 7 to 21. Julius Hinks interviewed Sarah and she spoke of her experiences from childhood onwards, describing the damaging effects of parental alienation, and also of not dealing with it correctly. Her message to parents is “don’t ever give up” and her story pays inarguable tribute to this.</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="background: white; line-height: 16.5pt; margin: 0in 22.5pt 0pt; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto; text-align: justify;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="background: white; line-height: 16.5pt; margin: 0in 22.5pt 0pt; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto; text-align: justify;"><strong><span style="color: #333333; font-family: Arial; font-size: 9pt;">How old were you when your parents separated and can you remember what your relationship was like with your father?</span></strong> </div><a name='more'></a><div class="MsoNormal" style="background: white; line-height: 16.5pt; margin: 0in 22.5pt 0pt; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto; text-align: justify;"></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="background: white; line-height: 16.5pt; margin: 0in 22.5pt 0pt; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto; text-align: justify;"><span style="color: #333333; font-family: Arial; font-size: 9pt;">I was seven, and we got sent to our auntie’s in Mapplethorpe for six months while they were sorting the marriage out - supposedly. One day out of the blue my uncle and my mother turned up in a car, got us and went down to <city w:st="on"><place w:st="on">London</place></city> and that was it.</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="background: white; line-height: 16.5pt; margin: 0in 22.5pt 0pt; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto; text-align: justify;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="background: white; line-height: 16.5pt; margin: 0in 22.5pt 0pt; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto; text-align: justify;"><span style="color: #333333; font-family: Arial; font-size: 9pt;">My relationship with my father beforehand is difficult to remember. He was a milkman. I can remember him coming home on his milk float. I can remember going to the park with him. We always used to have fun. It was happy. It’s when I look back after he left and my step-dad moved in that there were bad times. So I have better memories when my dad was there.</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="background: white; line-height: 16.5pt; margin: 0in 22.5pt 0pt; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto; text-align: justify;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="background: white; line-height: 16.5pt; margin: 0in 22.5pt 0pt; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto; text-align: justify;"><strong><span style="color: #333333; font-family: Arial; font-size: 9pt;">What was your mother’s attitude to your father after they separated?</span></strong></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="background: white; line-height: 16.5pt; margin: 0in 22.5pt 0pt; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto; text-align: justify;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="background: white; line-height: 16.5pt; margin: 0in 22.5pt 0pt; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto; text-align: justify;"><span style="color: #333333; font-family: Arial; font-size: 9pt;">This is where my mind starts to get muddled because we were told of all kinds of things: “your dad used to hit you”; “your dad used to do this…” You don’t remember any of this happening but you start to believe it because otherwise why would anyone tell their children that?</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="background: white; line-height: 16.5pt; margin: 0in 22.5pt 0pt; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto; text-align: justify;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="background: white; line-height: 16.5pt; margin: 0in 22.5pt 0pt; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto; text-align: justify;"><span style="color: #333333; font-family: Arial; font-size: 9pt;">Then - that was it. No contact. She took the relationship away out of spite against him. She had the biggest weapon of all and she used us against him.</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="background: white; line-height: 16.5pt; margin: 0in 22.5pt 0pt; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto; text-align: justify;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="background: white; line-height: 16.5pt; margin: 0in 22.5pt 0pt; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto; text-align: justify;"><strong><span style="color: #333333; font-family: Arial; font-size: 9pt;">What do you think you missed out on?</span></strong></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="background: white; line-height: 16.5pt; margin: 0in 22.5pt 0pt; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto; text-align: justify;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="background: white; line-height: 16.5pt; margin: 0in 22.5pt 0pt; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto; text-align: justify;"><span style="color: #333333; font-family: Arial; font-size: 9pt;">I missed out on a lot. I have a youngest sister, Paula, from my dad’s second marriage who’s just turned 19. I see him with her in a really close relationship. When I got back in touch with him at 21 she was about six years old - probably around the same age I was when my parents split up. I used to see him teaching her how to ride her bike. Her mum worked in the city so he used to be with her all the time. They are very close and we’ve not got that. I can’t call him dad. I can say that he’s my dad but, to his face, I find it very difficult to call him dad because he hasn’t been a dad. Not necessarily through his fault, but I’m very uncomfortable with that word.</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="background: white; line-height: 16.5pt; margin: 0in 22.5pt 0pt; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto; text-align: justify;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="background: white; line-height: 16.5pt; margin: 0in 22.5pt 0pt; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto; text-align: justify;"><span style="color: #333333; font-family: Arial; font-size: 9pt;">“She had the biggest weapon of all and she used us against him.”</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="background: white; line-height: 16.5pt; margin: 0in 22.5pt 0pt; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto; text-align: justify;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="background: white; line-height: 16.5pt; margin: 0in 22.5pt 0pt; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto; text-align: justify;"><strong><span style="color: #333333; font-family: Arial; font-size: 9pt;">How did you find out that what your mother was saying about your Dad wasn’t true?</span></strong></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="background: white; line-height: 16.5pt; margin: 0in 22.5pt 0pt; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto; text-align: justify;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="background: white; line-height: 16.5pt; margin: 0in 22.5pt 0pt; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto; text-align: justify;"><span style="color: #333333; font-family: Arial; font-size: 9pt;">Once my step-dad moved in it was a very violent house. There was drink. There were lots of beatings. I haven’t spoken to my mother for 15 years and you don’t stop talking to your mother for no reason. I didn’t have any bad feelings toward my Dad and I know what she said about him was lies. He says what she accused him of never happened, and my older two sisters said it was untrue; her trying to turn us against him. </span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="background: white; line-height: 16.5pt; margin: 0in 22.5pt 0pt; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto; text-align: justify;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="background: white; line-height: 16.5pt; margin: 0in 22.5pt 0pt; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto; text-align: justify;"><strong><span style="color: #333333; font-family: Arial; font-size: 9pt;">As well as the beatings, do you think that her lies contributed to the breakdown in your relationship with your mother?</span></strong></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="background: white; line-height: 16.5pt; margin: 0in 22.5pt 0pt; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto; text-align: justify;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="background: white; line-height: 16.5pt; margin: 0in 22.5pt 0pt; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto; text-align: justify;"><span style="color: #333333; font-family: Arial; font-size: 9pt;">Definitely. I used to see other friends with their family and think that their kissing and cuddling was wrong because we never had any of that. I had a lot of resentment against her for what she did for no reason except to hurt him.</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="background: white; line-height: 16.5pt; margin: 0in 22.5pt 0pt; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto; text-align: justify;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="background: white; line-height: 16.5pt; margin: 0in 22.5pt 0pt; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto; text-align: justify;"><span style="color: #333333; font-family: Arial; font-size: 9pt;">I think a lot of mothers do that nowadays. After being pregnant, and in the majority of cases, always being there for the child, a mother can feel she has a move powerful role in the child’s life and feels that she can use the child against the father. But nobody has the right to do that. A child has two parents and has the right to see them, whatever their problems. Using kids as a weapon shows you’re not thinking about the child. You’re just thinking about how to hurt the father. It’s just spite, sheer nastiness.</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="background: white; line-height: 16.5pt; margin: 0in 22.5pt 0pt; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto; text-align: justify;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="background: white; line-height: 16.5pt; margin: 0in 22.5pt 0pt; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto; text-align: justify;"><strong><span style="color: #333333; font-family: Arial; font-size: 9pt;">For how many years did he try to see you after the marriage broke up?</span></strong></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="background: white; line-height: 16.5pt; margin: 0in 22.5pt 0pt; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto; text-align: justify;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="background: white; line-height: 16.5pt; margin: 0in 22.5pt 0pt; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto; text-align: justify;"><span style="color: #333333; font-family: Arial; font-size: 9pt;">He tried for a few years and he took tranquilizers for depression which he ended up addicted to. After three years he remarried and packed his bags for the honeymoon and his wife had taken tranquilizers away. She spent her honeymoon with him going cold turkey. I tried for a couple of years to see him but he had a new life and moved on. He let a lot of years go by. </span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="background: white; line-height: 16.5pt; margin: 0in 22.5pt 0pt; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto; text-align: justify;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="background: white; line-height: 16.5pt; margin: 0in 22.5pt 0pt; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto; text-align: justify;"><span style="color: #333333; font-family: Arial; font-size: 9pt;">He says to us that he used to send cards and presents on our birthdays and Christmas. None of us ever got any of those. Maybe they came and we were stopped from having them but he then says that he stopped doing that after a couple of years because he wasn’t getting anything back and assumed that we weren’t getting them.</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="background: white; line-height: 16.5pt; margin: 0in 22.5pt 0pt; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto; text-align: justify;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="background: white; line-height: 16.5pt; margin: 0in 22.5pt 0pt; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto; text-align: justify;"><span style="color: #333333; font-family: Arial; font-size: 9pt;">When Paula turned 18 she had a savings account of money that they had built up for her. He knew he had five other children. Why could he not have opened an account and put five or ten pounds in on each birthday and Christmas? There was nothing stopping him doing that to show us that he’d been doing something.</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="background: white; line-height: 16.5pt; margin: 0in 22.5pt 0pt; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto; text-align: justify;"><strong><span style="color: #333333; font-family: Arial; font-size: 9pt;">How is it when you spend time together nowadays?</span></strong></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="background: white; line-height: 16.5pt; margin: 0in 22.5pt 0pt; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto; text-align: justify;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="background: white; line-height: 16.5pt; margin: 0in 22.5pt 0pt; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto; text-align: justify;"><span style="color: #333333; font-family: Arial; font-size: 9pt;">Back then I think he’d pretty much given up. He’d been to the courts and back then it was hard to get any visitation rights at all. It was like he gave up and waited for us to go to him. If we wanted to come back one day then we would and if we didn’t, we didn’t - that seemed to be his attitude. I suppose that was his way of dealing with it but it does make it very difficult now. It’s not even the same as seeing other family members. When I go up to <city w:st="on"><place w:st="on">Lincoln</place></city> at Christmas to see my husband’s family we have a laugh and a joke. With my dad I always feel a bit more on edge because he doesn’t know who I am really and he doesn’t put the effort in that I feel he should do.</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="background: white; line-height: 16.5pt; margin: 0in 22.5pt 0pt; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto; text-align: justify;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="background: white; line-height: 16.5pt; margin: 0in 22.5pt 0pt; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto; text-align: justify;"><span style="color: #333333; font-family: Arial; font-size: 9pt;">I haven’t seen him since February last year and I’ve heard from him once since then. He doesn’t just phone up for a chat and I got to the point where I wasn’t going to be the one putting in the effort. What happened with the marriage wasn’t down to me and I don’t think that he should have left it.</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="background: white; line-height: 16.5pt; margin: 0in 22.5pt 0pt; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto; text-align: justify;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="background: white; line-height: 16.5pt; margin: 0in 22.5pt 0pt; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto; text-align: justify;"><strong><span style="color: #333333; font-family: Arial; font-size: 9pt;">When you and your dad got back into contact, initially how did you both try to rebuild your relationship?</span></strong></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="background: white; line-height: 16.5pt; margin: 0in 22.5pt 0pt; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto; text-align: justify;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="background: white; line-height: 16.5pt; margin: 0in 22.5pt 0pt; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto; text-align: justify;"><span style="color: #333333; font-family: Arial; font-size: 9pt;">My sister Gemma had been seeing him and she used to tell me he’d like to see me again. I was very nervous walking to his house and when he opened the door I remember feeling very awkward that he was my dad but I didn’t know him. You’re sat on the edge of your chair not knowing what to say. My little sister with her dolls was a distraction but there were awkward silences and as the years have gone on he’s put no effort in.</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="background: white; line-height: 16.5pt; margin: 0in 22.5pt 0pt; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto; text-align: justify;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="background: white; line-height: 16.5pt; margin: 0in 22.5pt 0pt; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto; text-align: justify;"><span style="color: #333333; font-family: Arial; font-size: 9pt;">He doesn’t phone up just to say hello. He doesn’t remember my kids’ birthdays - and they’re his grandchildren. I know it must be difficult for him because he had all those years taken away but it was like he gave up trying, which is the worst thing you can do.</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="background: white; line-height: 16.5pt; margin: 0in 22.5pt 0pt; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto; text-align: justify;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="background: white; line-height: 16.5pt; margin: 0in 22.5pt 0pt; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto; text-align: justify;"><span style="color: #333333; font-family: Arial; font-size: 9pt;">I don’t bother phoning him now at Christmas because I think “why should I be the one?” He only lives two hours away, and a phone call isn’t difficult. I wanted to try and see if I could build some sort of relationship with him. You have this romantic idea in your head that you’ll be able to get something back but the reality is you can’t get those years back. You can’t force a bond if contact is so minimal that you can’t build on it.</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="background: white; line-height: 16.5pt; margin: 0in 22.5pt 0pt; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto; text-align: justify;"><span style="color: #333333; font-family: Arial; font-size: 9pt;">“Even if you think you’re going nowhere, don’t ever give up.” </span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="background: white; line-height: 16.5pt; margin: 0in 22.5pt 0pt; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto; text-align: justify;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="background: white; line-height: 16.5pt; margin: 0in 22.5pt 0pt; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto; text-align: justify;"><strong><span style="color: #333333; font-family: Arial; font-size: 9pt;">Would you say that your relationship with men have been affected because of you being alienated from your Dad?</span></strong></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="background: white; line-height: 16.5pt; margin: 0in 22.5pt 0pt; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto; text-align: justify;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="background: white; line-height: 16.5pt; margin: 0in 22.5pt 0pt; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto; text-align: justify;"><span style="color: #333333; font-family: Arial; font-size: 9pt;">I think trust is a big one. I don’t let people in easy. But I think the main way that it affect me is when I got with Stanley, which was 15 years ago, I saw that his family were the complete opposite to mine. His mum and dad are still together. He dotes on his mum; he always gives her a kiss and a huge. The whole family is very close and I couldn’t deal with that. I was very, very uncomfortable. My brothers and sisters and I find it embarrassing to be like that with each other because we weren’t brought up in that way.</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="background: white; line-height: 16.5pt; margin: 0in 22.5pt 0pt; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto; text-align: justify;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="background: white; line-height: 16.5pt; margin: 0in 22.5pt 0pt; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto; text-align: justify;"><span style="color: #333333; font-family: Arial; font-size: 9pt;">With other people I can be like that. I’ve accepted that you can give your friend who’s upset a hug and it doesn’t mean that you’re some kind of freak for doing so. I’ve had to discover that outside of the family I grew up in.</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="background: white; line-height: 16.5pt; margin: 0in 22.5pt 0pt; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto; text-align: justify;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="background: white; line-height: 16.5pt; margin: 0in 22.5pt 0pt; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto; text-align: justify;"><strong><span style="color: #333333; font-family: Arial; font-size: 9pt;">Do you have a message for a father who’s being alienated from his children and his tempted to give up?</span></strong></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="background: white; line-height: 16.5pt; margin: 0in 22.5pt 0pt; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto; text-align: justify;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="background: white; line-height: 16.5pt; margin: 0in 22.5pt 0pt; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto; text-align: justify;"><span style="color: #333333; font-family: Arial; font-size: 9pt;">Never give up - because you’re giving up on that child. You’re giving up on your relationship with that child and if you do that you can’t get it back. If you can’t see them, one way of showing that you do remember birthdays and Christmas is to set up an account for that child and keep putting the money in. Even if it’s just a bit, you’ve got an account there, stamped, dated, to show that you remembered.</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="background: white; line-height: 16.5pt; margin: 0in 22.5pt 0pt; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto; text-align: justify;"><span style="color: #333333; font-family: Arial; font-size: 9pt;"><br />
</span><br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="background: white; line-height: 16.5pt; margin: 0in 22.5pt 0pt; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto; text-align: justify;"><span style="color: #333333; font-family: Arial; font-size: 9pt;">Never just try and move on. You can’t start a new life thinking that when they’re ready they’ll come back because it’s gone by then and the damage is done.</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="background: white; line-height: 16.5pt; margin: 0in 22.5pt 0pt; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto; text-align: justify;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="background: white; line-height: 16.5pt; margin: 0in 22.5pt 0pt; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto; text-align: justify;"><strong><span style="color: #333333; font-family: Arial; font-size: 9pt;">Do you feel that that government makes strong enough law, the judiciary are effective enough or that the professionals are strong enough to protect children?</span></strong></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="background: white; line-height: 16.5pt; margin: 0in 22.5pt 0pt; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto; text-align: justify;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="background: white; line-height: 16.5pt; margin: 0in 22.5pt 0pt; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto; text-align: justify;"><span style="color: #333333; font-family: Arial; font-size: 9pt;">No. I don’t think they try. If they feel the child’s in a safe home they don’t really bother. My brother-in-law was told on October 9th by the court that his ex’s solicitor has to set up weekly contact with his baby at a contact centre and he’s still had nothing. Surely the courts should be phoning up her solicitor and saying “get it sorted now!” They don’t think about the children. They might say they do but they don’t actually sit down and talk to the kids and actually understand.</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="background: white; line-height: 16.5pt; margin: 0in 22.5pt 0pt; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto; text-align: justify;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="background: white; line-height: 16.5pt; margin: 0in 22.5pt 0pt; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto; text-align: justify;"><span style="color: #333333; font-family: Arial; font-size: 9pt;">I think as well that there’s a belief that kiddies don’t need their dads, which I completely and utterly disagree with. A child definitely needs both parents. But I think that a lot of these people think that a child’s better off with their mother. Well I know that I wasn’t better off with my mother.</span></div></div>Fighting Backhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10680648824756930269noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4340635590080462435.post-61581373803893556432011-11-28T21:04:00.000-05:002011-11-28T21:04:24.176-05:00Battle For Alimony Reform Heats Up In FL, CA - From The Fathers And Families Website - Is This A Step Towards Equality For Men?<h2><a href="http://www.fathersandfamilies.org/?p=21353" target="_blank">Battle for Alimony Reform Heats up in FL, CA</a></h2><small><span style="font-family: Arial;">November 21st, 2011 by Glenn Sacks, MA, Executive Director</span></small><br />
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<div class="entry">A Florida bill has been introduced to abolish lifetime alimony and clean up other abuses within the system, similar to the alimony reform bill <a href="http://www.fathersandfamilies.org/?p=19504"><span style="color: #990000;">recently passed in Massachusetts</span></a>. One of Florida’s largest newspapers, the <em>Orlando Sentinel</em>, <a href="http://articles.orlandosentinel.com/2011-11-19/news/os-scott-maxwell-divorce-alimony-112011-20111119_1_alimony-divorce-legislator"><span style="color: #990000;">attacked the bill</span></a> as a windfall for “wealthy men who cheat on their wives.”<br />
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Many Fathers and Families members have experienced the injustices of the current alimony system firsthand–we ask that you<strong> write a Letter to the Editor of the <em>Sentinel</em> </strong>by clicking <a href="http://www.orlandosentinel.com/news/opinion/orl-letters-to-editor-form,0,2447169.customform"><span style="color: #990000;">here</span></a> and/or comment on the bill <a href="http://discussions.orlandosentinel.com/20/orlnews/os-scott-maxwell-divorce-alimony-112011-20111119/10"><span style="color: #990000;">here</span></a>.<br />
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<strong>A Low-Rent Attack <strong></strong></strong><em>Sentinel</em> columnist Scott Maxwell employs anti-male stereotypes in his piece <a href="http://articles.orlandosentinel.com/2011-11-19/news/os-scott-maxwell-divorce-alimony-112011-20111119_1_alimony-divorce-legislator"><span style="color: #990000;">In new alimony bill, wealthy, cheating men could pay less</span></a>, and informs us that the bill is “anti-woman,” ”unconstitutional,” “radical,” “Draconian,” etc. In a state where alimony obligors are often unable to retire at a normal age because they must continue to pay alimony, Maxwell is somehow unable to come up with any family law experts who like the bill.<br />
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Ritch Workman, the bill’s sponsor, is working with the group <a href="http://www.floridaalimonyreform.com/"><span style="color: #990000;">Florida Alimony Reform</span></a>, and says he’s trying to make alimony fair, explaining, “[a] short-term marriage ending in long-term alimony is a mistake.” Maxwell feels compelled to tell us that Workman recently finalized his own divorce and that “several other local legislators are also divorced or currently going through one.”<br />
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Maxwell criticizes HB 549 because it “would allow previous divorce agreements to be reopened and renegotiated.” However, if this weren’t part of the bill, how could one end lifetime alimony for the aging obligors who are chained to it?<br />
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Maxwell tells us:<br />
<div style="padding-left: 30px;"><br />
</div><div style="padding-left: 30px;">Orlando attorney Amy Goodblatt also expressed concerns about Workman’s proposal to automatically terminate alimony payments when the payer reaches retirement age.</div><div style="padding-left: 30px;"><br />
</div><div style="padding-left: 30px;">“It’s clear this legislation has an agenda,” she said. “This statute is very, very much aimed at protecting men.”</div><div style="padding-left: 30px;"><br />
</div>True or not, Maxwell does not share with us why is a problem.<br />
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<strong>Fathers and Families’ Current Alimony Legislation</strong><br />
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Fathers and Families has been involved in alimony reform in California and Massachusetts, with some success, and we are accustomed to seeing attorneys and misguided women’s groups mischaracterize efforts to balance the spousal support system<br />
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Our latest reform bill, California <a href="http://info.sen.ca.gov/cgi-bin/postquery?bill_number=sb_481&sess=CUR&house=B&site=sen"><span style="color: #990000;">SB 481</span></a>, will curb the common family court practice of issuing “double dipping” spousal support orders. ”Double dipping” is when the same stream of income is counted twice in a family law action — once for purposes of valuing that income stream as a division of property, then again for spousal/partner support purposes when the spouse/partner receives the income in the future.<br />
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<strong>NOW Opposes Alimony Reform</strong><br />
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The National Organization for Women has come out against SB 481, but we’ve lined up a great deal of support from influential California political organizations who realize that this is not a gender issue, including: the Family Law Section of the California State Bar; the Association of Certified Family Law Specialists; numerous prominent family law and accounting firms; and others.<br />
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<a href="http://info.sen.ca.gov/cgi-bin/postquery?bill_number=sb_481&sess=CUR&house=B&site=sen"><span style="color: #990000;">SB 481</span></a> comes on the heels of <a href="http://www.fathersandfamilies.org/?p=8224"><span style="color: #990000;">SB 1482</span></a>, an alimony reform bill we helped pass last year. <a href="http://www.fathersandfamilies.org/?p=8224"><span style="color: #990000;">SB 1482</span></a> allows some alimony obligors to obtain court orders requiring vocational examinations for their exes, and mandates that judges follow the exams’ findings when determining spousal support levels. Both <a href="http://info.sen.ca.gov/cgi-bin/postquery?bill_number=sb_481&sess=CUR&house=B&site=sen"><span style="color: #990000;">SB 481</span></a> and <a href="http://www.fathersandfamilies.org/?p=8224"><span style="color: #990000;">SB 1482</span></a> are sponsored by Senator Roderick Wright (D-Inglewood).</div>Fighting Backhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10680648824756930269noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4340635590080462435.post-3395438973361939772011-11-27T19:54:00.004-05:002011-11-27T20:01:30.061-05:00A Recent Experience Of Nicholas Haas Attempting To Speak To Judge Edwin Kelly<div class="journal-entry-text"><h2 class="title"><a class="journal-entry-navigation-current" href="http://www.nhinsider.com/letters-to-the-editor/2011/10/11/family-court-justice-think-again.html">Family Court Justice? Think again....</a> </h2><div class="journal-entry-tag journal-entry-tag-post-title"><span class="posted-on"><img alt="Date" class="inline-icon date-icon" src="http://www.nhinsider.com/universal/images/transparent.png" title="Date" /></span>On Wednesday, October 5th 2011, Hooksett Town Official, Nicholas Haas, of Hooksett NH, went to the Honorable Edwin Kelly's office in Concord NH.</div><div class="journal-entry-tag journal-entry-tag-post-title"><br />
Mr. Haas, a concerned citizen of the wrong-doings happening to parents in New Hampshire, was requesting a 10 minute meeting with Judge Kelly.</div><div class="journal-entry-tag journal-entry-tag-post-title"><br />
Mr. Haas spoke with Judge Kelly's Secretary through an intercom, who then told Mr. Haas that Judge Kelly does not meet with citizens involving open cases, and that he can contact Judge Kelly in writing.</div><div class="journal-entry-tag journal-entry-tag-post-title"><br />
A New Hampshire Citizen, requested a meeting with the Administrative Court Judge, only to be denied his rights AS a citizen, to be heard on an issue that involves families all across the state.<br />
<br />
</div><div class="journal-entry-tag journal-entry-tag-post-title">Mr. Haas and his wife, Samantha Haas, have tried contacting Judge Kelly "in writing" on more than one occasion. Sometimes they receive a letter that states Judge Kelly cannot help, and sometimes, the requests in writing simply go unanswered.</div></div>Fighting Backhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10680648824756930269noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4340635590080462435.post-84659557819971145562011-11-26T22:33:00.000-05:002011-11-26T22:33:34.348-05:00ACFC Outlines Efforts In Promoting Shared Parenting Across The U.S.A.<div align="center" style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-size: 140%;"><strong><span style="color: #993300;"><span style="color: red;">Video Support for Shared Parenting </span></span></strong></span><span style="font-size: 140%;"><strong><span style="color: #993300;"><span style="color: red;"></span></span></strong></span></div><br />
<div style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;"><span style="font-family: arial, helvetica, sans-serif;">(From <a href="http://www.acfc.org/" target="_blank">ACFC</a> Website, September 20th, 2011)</span></span></div><br />
<span style="font-family: Calibri;"><span style="font-family: arial, helvetica, sans-serif;">Below is another sampling of the ongoing efforts to reform family law. More and more legislators are taking a public stand for Shared Parenting. Momentum continues to grow as efforts to reform family law continue.</span></span><br />
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<strong><span style="font-family: arial, helvetica, sans-serif;">Blue October and Shared Parenting Seattle Style </span></strong><br />
<span style="font-family: arial, helvetica, sans-serif;">The Showbox in Seattle, Wa. was the latest stop this past Sunday in Blue October’s 40 city tour supporting their new album ‘Any Man In America’ and <img alt="" src="http://www.acfc.org/acfc/assets/Image/Seattle_Blue.jpg" style="float: right; height: 150px; margin: 1px; width: 200px;" />promoting Shared Parenting. From the show comes this </span><span style="font-family: arial, helvetica, sans-serif;"><a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7Fvkf4_0YDg" target="_blank">great video</a> of state Senator Jim Kastama talking with the audience about Shared Parenting. Senator Katsama is a long time supporter of Shared Parenting. While there is still plenty of room for improvement, shared parenting is on the rise in Washington. Note the tremendous crowd response at both the beginning and end of the video in support of Shared Parenting. The public ‘gets it.’ In legislative sessions earlier this year ACFC affiliates and supporters played pivotal roles in the introduction of Shared Parenting bills in over a dozen states. </span><span style="font-family: arial, helvetica, sans-serif;"></span><br />
<a name='more'></a>Many of these bills are still active. Kudos to Kevin Turner, leader of our Washington affiliate ‘The Other Parent,’ for his efforts in bringing these legislators to the Blue October concert. From left to right in the photo are Sen. Jim Kastama, Rep. Bruce Chandler, Justin Furstenfeld and Kevin Turner. Of note in this particular photo is that one legislator is a democrat and the other a republican affirming once again that shared parenting is an issue that is much greater than any one party and should be supported by legislators regardless of political affiliation. <br />
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<strong><span style="font-family: arial, helvetica, sans-serif;">South Carolina Paper Runs Story on Shared Parenting Bill</span></strong><br />
<span style="font-family: arial, helvetica, sans-serif;">The Fort Mill Times recently ran <a href="http://www.fortmilltimes.com/2011/09/14/1706043/dad-pushes-for-new-custody-law.html" target="_blank">this article</a> on the efforts of father Jeremy Walter to move a Shared Parenting bill in South Carolina. The article comments on the known gender bias of the courts with several legislators expressing support for the intent of the legislation. You’ll recall that South Carolina is the state that routinely locks up poor child support obligors and led to the recent Turner v. Rogers Supreme Court Case. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: arial, helvetica, sans-serif;">It’s impossible to ignore the linkage between the lack of Shared Parenting in custody cases and abuses within state child support systems. Both custody and child support systems are in need of comprehensive overhaul. Proposals positing that child support agencies should ‘mission creep’ and become monitors of access and interference issues are problematic. We are wary of suggestions that child support agencies should simply do a better job of ‘tracking’ individuals. What’s needed is a drastic reduction of the footprint of both the family courts and child support bureaucracies in the lives of American citizens. Proponents of the status quo recognize presumptive shared parenting addresses many of the problems arising from these government ‘systems’ hence the entrenched resistance. Congress should hold public oversight hearings regarding citizen abuses by support agencies.</span><br />
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<strong><span style="font-family: arial, helvetica, sans-serif;">Craig Schelske Discusses Custody Case on Anderson Cooper</span></strong><br />
<span style="font-family: arial, helvetica, sans-serif;">In May of this year we brought you <a href="http://www.prnewswire.com/news-releases/craig-schelske-and-former-dancing-with-the-stars-darling-sara-evans-returning-to-court-over-child-custody-121958148.html" target="_blank">the story</a> of Craig Schelske, a Nashville father who has been seeking to gain additional time with his children. Craig’s ex-wife happens to be country music singer, Sara Evans. Their divorce and ensuing custody battle was highly contentious, and public, with various types of false allegations being lodged against Craig. The result was a custody decision which turned him into a visitor in the life of his children. For most readers this all comes as no surprise.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: arial, helvetica, sans-serif;">However, in Craig’s case he was able to secure an apology and settlement, shortly before going to trial, from Evan’s attorney regarding the false statements. Unfortunately Craig has been gagged by the court and is not allowed to talk about his case or set the record straight despite being defamed by opposing counsel.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: arial, helvetica, sans-serif;">Today on Anderson Cooper’s new afternoon talk show Cooper will interview Craig and several others who have been through the family courts. In addition to Craig, several mothers without custody will also be discussing their experiences in the courts. We have no idea how the show will play out, although it’s likely the public will once again see how a number of ensuing problems could have been avoided had shared parenting been the presumptive starting point. ACFC appreciates Craig ‘stepping up’ and being a voice for fathers and family court reform. For more information on when the show airs in your area visit <span style="color: blue;">ww<a href="http://www.andersoncooper.com/2011/09/19/judge-pirro-defends-sarah-evans-husband/" target="_blank">w.andersoncooper.com</a></span>. Leave your comments at the show website.</span><br />
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<strong><span style="font-family: arial, helvetica, sans-serif;">Other News</span></strong><br />
<span style="font-family: arial, helvetica, sans-serif;">This past week Guilty Until Proven Innocent was publicly shown in both Illinois and Minnesota. On Saturday, September 24<sup>th</sup>, there will be another showing of the film in St. Paul Minnesota at the William Mitchell College of Law in room 323. Start time is 2:00 p.m. The screening is being hosted by our Minnesota affiliate, the Center for Parental Responsibility. (<a href="http://www.cpr-mn.org/" target="_blank">http://www.cpr-mn.org/</a>) You can purchase a copy of the film at <a href="http://www.gupifilm.com/" target="_blank"><span style="color: blue;">www.gupifilm.com</span></a>. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: arial, helvetica, sans-serif;">ACFC continues its leadership role in reforming family law and pushing for the adoption of Shared Parenting. Two weeks ago ACFC’s Michael McCormick was invited to address a gathering of attorneys, businessmen and family court personnel at a luncheon in Houston, Texas. A brief 15 minute presentation on the social and legal imperatives for Shared Parenting was followed by 30 minutes of non-stop questions. On conclusion of the luncheon a prominent family court judge indicated agreement with all points on both the need for Shared Parenting and the solid legal framework which supports the presumption of parental equality and autonomy. We are making a difference. Thanks to Chris M. for arranging this opportunity. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: arial, helvetica, sans-serif;">We need your help to continue these efforts. It costs money to get the word out and keep these issues before the public. Over the years we have helped pass many good bills, defeated numerous bad pieces of legislation and moved the culture significantly closer to shared parenting. With your help the efforts will continue. Please support these efforts by contributing to our advertising and public awareness fund. Thank you.</span><br />
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You can also help by forwarding this newsletter to your family and friends and reposting its content on your website blogs and facebook pages. For a direct URL to this message use this link.<br />
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ACFCFighting Backhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10680648824756930269noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4340635590080462435.post-47543700019442544142011-11-22T20:53:00.000-05:002011-11-22T20:53:37.824-05:00Judicial Child Abuse Blog Runs Article About NH Attorney And Guardian Ad Litem Tracy A. Bernson - It Appears Bernson Owes The IRS Nearly $30K In Unpaid Taxes!<h2 class="date-header"><span><span style="color: #222222;">Tuesday, November 22, 2011</span></span></h2><div class="date-posts"><div class="post-outer"><div class="post hentry"><a href="" name="6598329059284803502"></a><h3 class="post-title entry-title">Judicial Child Abuser, Attorney & GALTracy A. Bernson: Deadbeat Tax Evader </h3><div class="post-header"><div class="post-header-line-1"></div></div><div class="post-body entry-content" id="post-body-6598329059284803502">Investigators from the<b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: red;"> STOP! Judicial Child Abuse</span></b> research department have uncovered a federal tax lien levied against Judicial Child Abuser, <b style="background-color: white;">Attorney and GAL Tracy A. Bernson</b>. Her New Hampshire Bar Identification number is:<b> 15562</b><br />
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</div><div>It appears from the "<b>Notice of Federal Tax Lien</b>" filed August 214th, 2010, that<b style="background-color: yellow;"> Attorney & GAL Tracy A. Bernson owes the IRS nearly $30,000 in unpaid taxes</b>!</div><div><br />
</div><div>It is abundantly clear exactly why<b> Attorney & GAL Tracy A. Bernson</b> regularly files "Motions to Exceed Fees" in cases to which she is appointed - she needs to pilfer money from the N.H. Judicial System to pay her own back taxes!</div><div><br />
</div><div>Our researchers are currently investigating all cases to which<b> Tracy A. Bernson</b> was appointed as Guardian ad Litem to determine the extent of the fraud that she has been perpetrating upon the N.H. Judicial System.</div><div><br />
</div><div>It is the opinion of <b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: red;">STOP! Judicial Child Abuse</span></b> that potential or would-be clients of this Judicial Child Abuser and tax-evader avoid doing business with this evidently unethical, corrupt, law-violating practitioner.</div><div> </div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj7d8Yh8FXu0BCs_ruN8gH5rlT0It3nTfnTVCQFGKxg0xtoBZy8RtAOL7XNoULACIPeGcgE5a8cA3-ktdmWSSYaTDPREmPAJiTD-7pmh4apd4RHaapEy0xQqGbj8yIjCJx44_b8t9IhtA/s1600/bernsonlein.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" hda="true" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj7d8Yh8FXu0BCs_ruN8gH5rlT0It3nTfnTVCQFGKxg0xtoBZy8RtAOL7XNoULACIPeGcgE5a8cA3-ktdmWSSYaTDPREmPAJiTD-7pmh4apd4RHaapEy0xQqGbj8yIjCJx44_b8t9IhtA/s1600/bernsonlein.png" /></a></div><div><br />
</div></div></div></div></div>Fighting Backhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10680648824756930269noreply@blogger.com0